If I Only Were

Calum?

Calum found me in the bathroom. Since it's an all boys school, there are absolutely no girls bathrooms.
Yes, my hideout is a boys bathroom. Not weird.
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Calum burst into the room right before I was about to cut into my arm. Tears were flowing out of my eyes.
"Aria!" He slid to the ground where I was sitting, and grabbed the razor out of my hand. "No! Stop, you know that isn't good for you..."
"Calum, you don't understand."
"I understand enough for me to want you to stop."
I blushes. "Thanks Calum." I smiled, but my strength cracked. "I just don't want to do this anymore..." My eyes filled up with tears. I fell into his lap.
"What do you mean, 'this?'" He asked.
"I don't want to live. I don't want to. Please, I just don't know what to do anymore..." I was crying hysterically.
"Aria, it's okay. I understand.But hold on.... For me."
"I have. I've held on for five years, dammit. I think it's time." I was still in his lap.
"Hold on. You have so much to live for. And people need you. I need you."
"I want to hang on. I really do. I just... can't." I've never wanted to die so much before.
"What about coffee?"
I laughed. For the first time in a month, I laughed.
"You're right. I'm not gonna give up. For you." He smiled the smile I love him for.
"Aria, meet me at the cafe for some coffee."
"Can I have my razor back?"
"Only if you promise not to use it for awhile."
"I'll try." Then he helped me up.
See this is why I loved Calum. Our bond is unbreakable. Or so I thought.
-
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Calum had bought me a coffee. I can't afford one on my own. My dad never comes home. Maybe he doesn't like me, it's probably my eyes. The way they mirror my mom's.
Anyway, we were sipping our coffee. My sleeve accidentally fell down my arm.
Calum gasped. "Aria!" My arm was bloody from my newest cut. "You said you'd stop!"
"I said for a little while! I got through about six periods..." I blushed a bit.
"I thought you meant like a week, a month! Six periods?!"
I covered my arm. "I-I'm sorry..."
I ran out of the cafe crying. I would never be able to do this. To live normally, to live happily again.