If I Only Were

Dear Cecelia

Dear Cecelia,
I wanted to thank you for understanding what I'm going through.
But there's no way, that I'll ever be pulled back into light.
I'm just not meant to be happy, and because of that, I understand my fate, so please don't hate me.
I wanted to thank you for your kind words. And your encouraging smile, even though I've never seen it.
We may just be friends through the Internet, but you are the closest person to me, so please don't hate me.
I wanted to thank you for making me feel happy, even with those assholes Addison and Gracie.
Thank you for making me feel like a good person, even though I'm not.
Thank you for lifting my spirits, even when times were tough.
Thank you for pulling me out of suicide, more than once. Thank you for making me value life, and how short it is.
Thank you for being there, and relating to me. So I didn't feel like such an outcast. So I didn't feel like just a bother. So I didn't feel lonely or unwanted.
Thank you... Just thank you...

So, Cecelia. I ask of you one thing.
Do not become as extreme as me. Do not do the things that I have done. Do not cut yourself, and do not question your life. Do not ever lose your smile, and do not ever lose your point in living.
Don't question yourself, because you are perfect and have no flaws.
So go out and be brave, go out and just be yourself. Value your life, because life is short. Maybe even ask that James kid out.
Please just please, don't become me. Don't ever think about self-harm or suicide. It's not worth wasting your beauty. Just don't please don't ever become:
Aria Marie Rowens. Age Sixteen.
Don't ever become that girl.
I love you to pieces and it would kill me to see you become me. Stay Strong.
So that's what I ask of you.
So, Cecelia, I bid you well. Please don't ever change. And never take that smile off your face, because it's meant the world to me.

With Great Love,
Aria