Running on Empty

The marks of a muzzle Pt2: Fear

His natural response was, of course, to panic. His hands flew up to grasp at his neck, as though he needed to reassure himself that it was still there, that it hadn't vanished along with his voice.

He wasn't wearing a mask, there was nothing physically preventing him from speaking. It was as though the words just disappeared before they made it into the air, all that remained was a quiet sort of gasp.

"Hitoshi! Hitoshi calm down, listen to me!" Hizashi pulled him even closer and Hitoshi gripped onto his shirt like a lifeline. Why couldn't he speak?

After all those years of not being allowed to, now he was, but he couldn't?

His breathing picked up and he squeezed his eyes shut tight, willing himself to still be dreaming.

But he knew this time that he was wide awake, it was hard to ignore the cold heaviness of his waterlogged clothes.

It wasn't really helping, but he couldn't bring himself to do anything about it at the moment.

He felt Hizashi take a deep breath under him, and then the hero took his hand and placed it over his heart.

"Hitoshi, can you feel that?" His attempt to sound calm almost laughably contrasted how fast his heart was beating, but it was still noticeably slower than Hitoshi's. "Follow my breathing okay? You're alright I promise, you're okay, you're okay."

He started taking exaggerated breaths, muttering choruses of 'in' and 'out' and 'you're okay, you're alright'.

Hitoshi did his best to follow along, and even when he couldn't match Hizashi the pro still praised him and ran his fingers through his hair soothingly.

Gradually, his heart began to calm down, and he managed to control his breathing. He pressed his ear to Hizashi's chest to hear his heartbeat better and decidedly ignored the muffled squeal his guardian gave off at the action.

They sat like that for a minute, just focussing on breathing. And then Hizashi sighed, "Before we do anything else kiddo, we've both got to get warm and dry."

Hitoshi's eyes widened and he sat up, finally realising that they were both soaked now. Not only was the water from his clothes seeping into Hizashi's, but they'd been lying on sopping wet bedding.

He huffed a laugh as he wiped his eyes, signing with shaky hands, "I can't believe you poured water over me!"

Hizashi pouted and rubbed a stray tear from his cheek, "You wouldn't wake up when I called or shook you, it was all I could think of."

Hitoshi shook his head fondly as Hizashi looked at the dripping bed contemplatively. "You can't sleep in this tonight," he muttered, before facing Hitoshi. "You okay to change on your own?"

He nodded, and Hizashi fetched him a towel, before leaving to get himself dry.

A towel dry and a change of clothes later and they were both stood staring at the bed, as if through their gaze alone they could pull the water out.

Unfortunately, the sheets remained stubbornly drenched.

"I'm happy to take the sofa," Hizashi volunteered and Hitoshi tilted his head in question. "You can sleep in mine and Sho's bed. If you want! If not that's cool, no worries, I think we've got an airbed somewhere you could have?"

"Thank you," Hitoshi signed, before chewing on his lip nervously. "I don't want to be on my own though... will you stay with me?"

Hizashi looked a little surprised, but nodded, "Of course kiddo, that's fine."

He led them into his bedroom and they got settled under the covers. Hizashi left the lamps on, without even asking and Hitoshi was glad he did, he didn't want to be in the dark right now.

He was surrounded by Shouta and Hizashi. The whole room was full of them: their stuff, their scent, their memories. It was indescribably comforting to Hitoshi and he felt himself properly relaxing for the first time since he'd been woken up.

He heard Hizashi put his glasses in their case and rolled over to face him. He still had his hearing aids in. In fact, now that Hitoshi thought about it he hadn't even been in pyjamas when he woke him up. He wondered what could be so important that he was working on it so late.

Hizashi evidently saw him looking and smiled kindly, "I'm going to keep them in for now, just in case."

Hitoshi nodded, and as he did so his eyes caught a glimpse of a thin white line on the hero's cheekbone, usually obscured by his glasses. A thin white line that looked exactly like Hitoshi's but older and more faded.

A thin white line that had no doubt been caused by a muzzle.

He frowned and reached his hand up to trace it with his fingertips, the way Hizashi's smile faltered as he did so didn't escape his notice, and so he pulled away quickly, meeting the hero's eyes.

"You want to know about it?" Hizashi asked gently and Hitoshi blinked at how calm, how okay 'Zashi seemed at the prospect of talking about such a thing.

He didn't want to pry but, he was curious, and he had offered.

He met the hero's gaze, and nodded.