unbreakable heaven • awsten knight

1.16 talk in circles

houston tx
december 2008

Ellie almost feels guilty for having a good time.

Her mother just left, and her dad is probably either crying or drinking in his friend's kitchen— all while Ellie is laughing and joking with her friends.

She retracts into her own head when her thoughts begin spiralling, and eventually excuses herself from the conversation, exiting the living room and heading upstairs.

Awsten follows quickly after her. He'd noticed her slowly slipping back while everyone continued talking; so, he didn't hesitate to stand up and go after once she left the room.

"Hey," he says, gently, catching Ellie's attention as she stands in the middle of her bed room, staring blankly out of the window.

"Oh, hi," she responds, after being a little startled by his presence. "Sorry, I'll be back down there in a second, I'm just—"

"It's okay," Awsten interrupts, before she can even begin to make up an excuse. "If you need a minute, that's okay," he tells her, softly. "I just wanted to make sure you're alright."

Ellie hesitates for a moment, before offering him a small nod, to which Awsten slowly turns on his heels and starts walking away, to give her some privacy.

"Wait," Ellie calls after him, before he can take more than two steps away from her. "Can you stay?" She requests, in a timid voice.

"Are you sure?" Awsten raises an eyebrow, facing her again.

"Yeah, I just—" Ellie pauses, cutting herself off with a sigh. "I'd like it if you stayed," she adds, appearing to choose her words more thoughtfully, "but, you don't have to."

Awsten's expression softens, and he finds himself walking towards her without much thought; wrapping his arms around her as if it's second nature by now.

Ellie hugs him back, and closes her eyes, taking a minute to soak in the comfort that she feels from his presence.

"Hey, uh," Awsten clears his throat, after a few minutes of quiet. "Now that it's just us, I—... I kind of, cheated with the whole Secret Santa thing," he admits, carefully.

Ellie pulls away, with an odd expression, as she looks up at him. "What do you mean?" She frowns, as Awsten takes a step back.

He shoves his hand deep into his pocket, fishing around for something, before finally pulling out a small, black box.

Ellie tilts her head, her eyebrows furrowed, as Awsten hands her the box; she looks at him curiously, before beginning to lift the lid off of it.

"I know we said we were just doing Secret Santa, and— well, this technically isn't even that because I exceeded the budget," Awsten stares at the floor, sheepishly, starting to fall into a ramble. "And maybe I should've asked first, or something... I don't know. But, I just wanted to get you something, and this was perfect. I was gonna save it for your birthday but then I realised that I don't even know when your birthday is and—"

"Aws," Ellie finally cuts him off, almost whispering his name, breathlessly, as she stares at the necklace inside of the box.

Awsten eventually looks up at her, trying to gage her reaction.

"Is that good or bad?" He asks, carefully.

"Really good. I— You..." Ellie's voice trails off as she stares at the silver pendent. "It's a music note," she smiles.

"Yeah...I just thought that—"

"Stop talking yourself in circles," she cuts him off, with a small giggle, before he can begin falling into another anxious ramble. "This is so...Literally like, the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me."