its you | hyunlix

{e l e v e n - trauma}

changbin had left to go home, well, since its past his curfew. felix was left alone in his room, he laid down on his back. eyes stuck to the ceiling as tears fell slowly down his face.

not caring about anything, the male had blocked everything out. memories flashing before his eyes. all his thoughts and worries were ringing in his ears.

"mom?" i asked as i walked in, "where is she?" i dropped my carry-on, began my search for mom. walking towards the kitchen, i pushed the door. "mom, where's jaehwa?" i walked over to her, looking at her work.

"she and your father had to go to the hospital, jaehwa's in really bad pain sweetie." mom looked at me, forcing a smile out, "don't worry love, she'll be alright." but little did i know that my little sister was in so much pain.

"can we go see her?" i asked with hope filled eyes, sitting down on the chair next to her. "yes, we can. just remember to be careful, okay?" she looked at me, an expression i couldn't read. though, she looked at me, all i could see now was worry and pain.

we left the house, driving to the hospital. the ride wasn't as long as i expected, i looked at the date today. march twenty-five. i smiled, it  was supposed to be her and aunt arya's birthday party. jaehwa and i always knew to surprise aunt arya with a surprise party.

jaehwa's birthday was yesterday, the twenty-fourth. she's no more than four years younger than me, i smiled and looked at mom. the smile on my face faded as i saw tears rolling down her cheeks. "mom?" her eyes never left the road, "what's wrong?" i asked again.

she wiped her tears, "nothing's wrong, its just that we're missing your aunt's birthday." i nodded, looking back out the window. i knew something was wrong but they wouldn't tell me. we reached the hospital, parking the car in the parking lot. exiting the car, mom walked over to me and held my hand.

tear stained cheeks were what i saw when i looked up at her. she tightened her hold on my hand as we walked to the front desk. "lee jaehwa, mother and brother." she said as the nurse looked up and began typing on the desktop. "fourth floor, 325." the nurse said, as she gave us slips.

we left the front desk and to the elevator, pressing the fourth floor button as we entered it. it was like a one minute ride. but it felt longer and the air around us grew some tension. mom got a call, she looked at it and answered, "what's going on?" she asked.

"what? is that true?" she answered back as tears fell down her face. i didn't know her crying caused me to cry too. i wiped my tears away with the back of my palm.

as soon as the doors opened, mom pulled me, running towards jaehwa's room. the heart monitor wasn't beeping the way it would usually beep. i saw a nurse doing the chest compressions, while someone had gotten ready to intubate. "stop the resuscitation." the one whom i assumed to be the doctor.

the line went flat. i went to dad, "what's happening to jaehwa?" he looked at me, tears threatening to fall. "son, she was too sick. we didn't know about it." tears fell from my eyes, "so, is she coming back?" i asked.

he shook his head every slightly, "no son, she isn't coming back. today was her last day on earth, you'll get to see her again when it's your turn." i shook my head, "no, she'll come back. she has to." i cried, "she has to!"

"mr. and mrs. lee, i'm sorry for your loss." the doctor said, rubbing mom's back. i shook my head, "she has to come back. "felix honey, she's gone. she was too sick." i screamed, "no! she's not gone!" i went to her and shook her. "jaehwa! wake up, please wake up. i need you, you can't leave me."

felix didn't know he was choking back the sobs, tears still falling. "yongbok?" his grandmother entered the room, "everything okay?" she didn't know that her grandson blocked everything out.

the elder walked over to his bedside, sitting on his bed. "yongbok?" she quietly questioned, leaning down to embrace him, forcing him to sit up as he cried. realizing that he and his grandmother are hugging, he hugged her back and continued crying.

"i miss them," he sobbed out, "mimi, i miss them so much." felix's grandmother understood the pain, she knew he had to feel all his emotions. "i know bokkie, i know." she rubbed his back, hushing him.

𝑎/𝑛:: 𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒓𝒕 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒓, 𝒊 𝒌𝒏𝒐𝒘. 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝒂 𝒅𝒐𝒖𝒃𝒍𝒆 𝒖𝒑𝒅𝒂𝒕𝒆 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒏𝒐𝒕 𝒖𝒑𝒅𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒂 𝒍𝒐𝒏𝒈 (?) 𝒕𝒊𝒎𝒆.

2023: it's edited a little bit, pretty soon, i'll add more to this one.