[𝒀𝒐𝒖'𝒓𝒆 𝒎𝒚 𝒃𝒆𝒂𝒖𝒕𝒚] [] 𝐎𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐞𝐦𝐢 𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐬

[• sᴄᴀʀs •]

𝚆𝚛𝚒𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚗 𝚘𝚗: 𝙽𝚘𝚟. 17. 2021

HUGE TW FOR SELF HARM.
//ᴍɪɴᴏʀ sᴘᴏɪʟᴇʀs ғᴏʀ ᴏʙᴀɴᴀɪs ғᴀᴄᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ

He did it again. Why did he do mistakes like these. Why did he allways mess up. Why did he do things that he knew were wrong. Why was he so stupid. Why was he such a weakling to do these things to himself. Why. Why. Why.
Obanai was in his room, sitting on his futon, his knees close to his chest. His arm hurt, luckly he bandaged it up before it could stain his haori more. There were only a few droplets of blood on it. Obanai felt unlucky to have a haori that had alot of white. The stains were slightly visible since he washed it.
He had a hashira meeting tomorow aswell, Obanai hoped no one would notice the faint stains of blood from his bandaged arms. Especially that one person he feared the most. He feared that if Sanemi would find out, he'd hate him. Obanai hated himself anyway because of how he was and his life, so if anyone else found out of course they'd despise him too.

The next day came, so did the hashira meeting. Obanai felt anxious. Well he almost always did, but this time that anxiety grew stronger with every step he took towards Oyakata-samas mansion.
Obanai arrived early this time, probably because he couldn't sleep because of the anxiety and nervousness. Well, not earlier than Gyomei, the man always was the first one there.
Other than some minir changes, not many of the hashira noticed, being preoccupied with something else.
Well, the serpent hashira was always distant, never getting close to anyone and never letting anyone get, but this time the aura changed. Mitsuri even noticed that Obanai didn't seem to care or notice about this tense situation, so she went to a person who knew was confident and convincing. Sanemi.
"Excuse me, Shinazugawa-san.. Don't you think that Iguro-san is acting unusual?" She whispered.
"Hm? Unusual? I didn't notice anything." Sanemi replied, crossing his arms.
"Please, could you go and see what's the issue? You seem more fit for the job than me.. At least until master arrives." Mitsuri asked quietly.
"Hm. Fine." Sanemi said, then walked towards the tree Obanai sat on.
Now that he looked even more closer, even his snake, Kaburamaru was it? It looked worried. Nah, that's just his own imagination.
"Oi, Iguro, what's up with your damn mood change, hm?" Sanemi asked, almost seeming cold. He had to keep his reputation up between the corps.
Obanai turned his head to look down at Sanemi.
"I don't know what you mean. I feel completely fine." Obanai replied calmly.
"Lies! Quit with that stupid shit!" Sanemi said, being louder this time. Mitsuri watched from a distance, not wanting to intrerupt.
"How about you quit with the shouting. You can scream after the meeting is over." Iguro said, then looked away. Although Obanai didn't want to admit it, he didn't necessarily enjoy speaking so coldly with Sanemi. He felt his heart ache whenever he did that. But he also didnt want to admit the fact that he felt different around Sanemi. But Obanai had no hope for him to feel the same way. No way someone would feel something for such a lowly and weak person like him.
"Tsk. Fine then. But you're not getting away so easly." Sanemi said, then leaned onto the tree, looking down.

--------
"Who do you think will confess first?" Uzui asked Kyojuro, making sure no one could hear them.
"Hmm. Sanemi of course, he seems more straight forward. Plus, it's obvious he wants to tell him!" Rengoku answered confidently.
"Nah, I think Obanai will one day break down and tell Sanemi his feelings." Uzui intrerupted.
"Bet?" Kyojuro asked, looking up at Uzui.
"100 yen." Tengen looked back at Kyojuro.
"Deal." The flame hashira replied.
----------
The meeting was shortly over and Obanai could return home, but after most of the hashiras left and it was his turn to go home aswell, he was stopped by Sanemi.
The wind hashira grabbed Obanais' wrist, which almost made him flinch from the pain. His arms were full of wounds anyway.
"What's up with you? You're starting to worry me too." Sanemi asked, now in an oddly different tone.
"I already told you, there's nothing wrong with me." Obanai said, trying to pull his arm back, but he couldn't because of the pain.
Sanemis grip loosened.
"I still don't trust you, even Mitsuri's worried about you. Said you've been acting odd." He explained.
"And there's no need to be worried, I'm fine." Obanai peesisted.
Sanemi noticed the faint stains of blood on the serpent hashiras haori. He never knew that he went on a mission recently. Actually, Obanai didn't go on any mission. So why were there stains of blood on the sleeves of the haori... No, Obanai wouldn't.. right? Sanemi was getting more worried now.
He tightened his grip on Obanais wrist, pulling it up a little for the stains to be more visible.
Obanai panicked. Before Sanemi could say anything he pulled his wrist out of the grip, then quickly sprinted away.
Sanemi was left there, he was still trying to figure out what he just found out. Is that why.. But why would he do that? Why would Obanai do that to himself.
Sanemi didn't know, but he had to stop that. He felt like he needed to and that he could. So he followed Obanai around.
Sanemi got to his home. He knocked on the front door, one of the maids there opening the door. When she saw who was at the door she quickly stepped to the side and bowed. Sanemi found out where Obanais room was. Good thing he seemed to intimidate the people there.
Sanemi knocked on Obanais door. No response.
"If you won't answer me then I'll come in myself." He said, then opened the door. And there he was, Obanai was sitting on his futon, looking at his arm with a bloodied blade in his hand. Sanemi got a shiver down his spine. The hell he was looking at. He quickly ran to Obanai and grabbed the arm with the blade in hand, keeping it away from the other arm.
Obanai couldn't dare to look up, the moment he feared the most just came to reality. In this moment he hated himself the most. For letting people be worried about him.
"What the hell do you think you're doing!?" Sanemi shouted, looking directly a Obanai, then he noticed the bandages from his face weren't there.
Obanai didn't reply, but he could feel tears forming in his eyes.
"Why? Why are you doing this to yourself!?" Sanemi shouted again, his voice becoming shaky.
Obanai couldn't bear to hear Sanemi screaming at him, the tears started to roll down his face.
"Please speak to me!" Sanemi said, his grip on Obanais arm loosening up.
"I apologize.." The serpent hashira said quietly.
"Why? WHY?!" Sanemi shouted.
"Someone as lowly and despised as me.. , with such cursed blood deserves to bleed out like this.." Obanai said, almost whispering, more tears forming.
"YOU FUCKING MORON! WHAT DO YOU MEAN DESPISED? I LOVE YOU, YOU IDIOT!" Sanemi shouted, voice shaky. He couldn't control his tone.
Obanais eyes widened.
"No.. You don't deserve to love someone as sinful like me." He said, now starting to cry.
"Look at me." Sanemi said, letting out a shaky sigh.
Obanai hesitantly looked up. If Sanemi has already seen what he did to his body, then he should see his ugly and cursed face.
Sanemi didn't show any reaction to Obanais cut mouth, he just pulled him closer to his chest into a hug.
"Promise me you won't do something as stupid as what you did right now." Sanemi said, with a quieter tone.
Obanai just nodded.
"I love you too.." He whispered, still crying.

-------
-Bonus-
"So who confessed first?" Uzui asked.
Both Sanemi and Obanai pointed at the wind hashira.
"HAH I TOLD YOU!" Kyojuro said, loud as usual.
"SHUT UP YOU UNFLAMBOYANT PERSON!" Uzui shouted back, shoving the 100 yen at Kyojuro.
"Thank you!" The flame hashira replied, smiling.
Obanai and Sanemi looked at eachother.
-like some minutes time skip-
"Did you really bet on who will confess first-" Sanemi asked, holding back a laugh.
"YES WHAT ABOUT IT?" Uzui said, crossing his arms and looking away.
"This just proves how stupid you are." Sanemi said, walking towards the tree Obanai was sitting on, leaning on it.