~ Guardian Angel ~ (Completed) ✅

79

(y/n) - your name

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I yawn out as I walked into my bedroom, reading on my phone as I opened the door to talk to Loki. I look up and freeze, seeing my room empty of life besides me and I frown remembering why.

"Right... he's not here..."  I sigh out, remembering my conversation with him last night about me being barren.

"But you have bled. Surely that is an indication of your ability to have children."

"I wish but my eggs have been sterilised. All of them. A side effect to my treatments that just turned them into dead cells. I'll bleed like normal until my body disposes these eggs completely."

"You can't produce new ones?"

"Unfortunately no. What's done is done and can't be reversed."

Loki was quiet the rest of the night, going to sleep whereas as I stayed up all night feeling miserable. I had taken my harness off so Loki wouldn't feel my self-pity. When I woke up again from passing out from exhaustion, I was left alone in my bedroom. Loki was nowhere to be found on the compound.

I guess he needed time to process this...

I grumble out, deciding to take a bath to ease my mind off things. I strip and slip into the bath filled with scalding hot water, sighing out while music played in the background. My mind wandered to Loki's face when I told him, the look of disappointment that he tried to hide from me. He had turned off his emotions so I couldn't feel what he felt and it made me worried... almost sad like I needed to prepare myself for some bad news.

"That ass wouldn't actually dump me cause I can't have kids would he?" I frown as I brought my knees to my chest. "It's not like this is something I could've... controlled..."

Of course, I controlled it.

I knew the side effects of taking those experimental treatments.

I chose living over having something that I thought wouldn't be useful to me in the future if I didn't die.

"Well, if he dumps me cause I can't have kids, he's a grade A bastard." I grumble angrily as I lay my head on my knees. I mentally prepare myself for the moment Loki decides to drop me as I took my bath, getting out and drying my body once I was done. As I changed into my underwear, I freeze as I look at myself in the mirror.

I had imperfections over imperfections and on top of them, my body was littered with battle scars and wounds that would never fade away. All this self-loathing made me grow angry at how disgusting I looked.

I sigh out as I run my hands down my face, brushing my fingertips against the numerous bullet wounds and cuts over my body. "I'm hideous... no wonder Loki doesn't want to be with me... why would he-"

"-Meow~" I'm snapped out from my negative thoughts and I look down to see where the sound came from. "Meow~"

It's a tiny black cat.

I blink at the tiny kitten that sat and stared right up at me on my bathroom floor with its giant green eyes. "How did you get in here?" The small thing meows up again at me, just staring.

Ok, it's kinda creeping me out.

I quickly put on some clothes before kneeling in front of the kitten to not scare it from my big size. It just continued staring with those giant green eyes.