stumbling into line (sidemen ff)

Chapter 32: 'Tell me to stop.'

28th April 2014 3:54pm

A loud knock emanates from the front door and Ethan groans. He's the only one in and he doesn't want to get it. He's lazy and he contemplates leaving it before he hears loud, disturbed shouting.

"Ethan, fucking let me in! I know you're in there and I know you're awake." The familiar tone of Simon came drifting up and through his bedroom window. He sounded different though; angry, upset and tired. A combination that often accompanied Simon and his loud incessant banging on the door of Ethan's family home.

So, he gives in and rises from his computer chair with a groan. If you asked Ethan seven months ago if he thought that answering the door to a shouting, animal-like and sometimes crying Simon would be a regular thing then he would have told you that you're stupid because Simon didn't live in London, in fact, he lived miles away but here he was, answering the door, yet again, to an angry animal-like, though not crying, Simon and he wasn't even phased. It had probably happened at least six times in the one month that Simon had been living in London but Ethan never turned him down because he would happily be a punching bag everyday to spend any sort of time with Simon. Maybe that's a little extreme but he did enjoy the company and the fact that the encounters and conversations never went past Ethan's bedroom walls.

"What's up?" Ethan asks as Simon barges past him, determination in his eyes.

"JJ ate my fucking chicken nuggets. My chicken nuggets." Simons seethes and Ethan barely holds back a laugh at how easily provoked Simon is.

"Do you want me to make you some chicken nuggets, iccle baby?" Ethan teases, pinching one of Simon's cheeks. Simons scowl and swats his hand away before grumbling a yes and heading up stairs.

-------------------------------

"Do you know what best friends do when one of them is upset?" Ethan asks, setting a plate of chicken nuggets down on the bed before heading over to his mini fridge.

"What?" Simon replies, shoving around three nuggets in his mouth.

"Drink." Ethan turns around with three bottles of beer in each hand and an evil grin on his face.

"Ugh." Simon groans, "This isn't going to end well."

"That's the point!" Ethan laughs and pops open two bottles, handing one to Simon. For some unknown reason, he always kept beer in his fridge. It's not as if he was a lone drinker because he would never do that, it's sad and lonely and not at all fun but he knew that in some circumstances alcohol was needed and he was grateful for that now.

-------------------------------

"I get it, it's just chicken nuggets but he's such a dick about everything. I mean, he doesn't even take notice of the fact that we have personal shelves in the fridge and the freezer. He's stupid." Simon slurs, his voice carrying tones of annoyance and knowledge, like he was the smartest and the best and that JJ had done a great injustice. It reminded Ethan of an olden time film but he couldn't put his finger on the name, or who was in it, or even what it was about.

"But sometimes," Ethan leans closer to Simon, pointing and wagging his finger in any which way, "people just really want chicken nuggets and he was probably going to replace them, hopefully."

Both of their eyes are half open as they down the rest of their fourth beers and Simon knows that he is staying the night because he may not be very responsible as a drinker but he definitely was a responsible driver, he thinks, but he can't really remember.

His vision is fuzzy and he swears that there was only one Ethan here when he arrived, he feels like his head is full of fluff and, whilst it is nice, it also makes him uncomfortable because he wants to be able to think and he wants to be able to know that the thoughts he is thinking are actually his own and not the beer's. That's why he decides to have a glass of water.

It doesn't make him any more capable to decide his own thoughts but it does clear his head and allow him to string together why he is really here.

Sure, he gets easily provoked and he did feel like punching JJ in the face but he concludes that he is here because he enjoys Ethan's company because no matter how many chicken nuggets go missing, Simon would never pass up a chance to see Ethan. Maybe that's a stupid realisation, why, after six months, would Simon only just realise he enjoys spending time with someone? His answer was simple, because their time was different. What they do and talk about when they are alone is none of anyone's business and Simon likes the secret side to their friendship. So, in short, Simon just realised that, not only does he enjoy spending time with Ethan, but he immensely enjoys spending alone time with Ethan.

Many of the reasons for this are still unknown but one thing he does know is that when they're alone he can stare at Ethan all he wants and either he is too stupid to notice or he just doesn't mind. Simon hoped for the latter.

He hadn't yet noticed that Ethan was actually talking, he instead was staring at moving lips but not listening to a single word that came from them.

He sits up, the alcohol bubbling in his stomach at the sudden movement and making him feel slightly sick.

"You weren't even listening, fantastic." Ethan groans, placing his bottle on the floor, "Ya know, I really love it when people don't listen to me."

He's being snarky now and Simon isn't sure if he likes it but to be completely honest, he isn't sure of much.

He hasn't been for a while now. Every single day, he questions something new about himself. Seriously, since when has he loved chicken nuggets so much? Since when has he found his male friend attractive? It just wasn't him and he didn't like it one bit.

Nobody speaks, it's slightly awkward as they just stare at each other and Simon gives off a lopsided, effortless smile, which causes Ethan to gulp and try not to melt into a puddle.

Simon leans in closer, his breathe hot against Ethan's lips and the stench of alcohol passing between both of them.

"Tell me to stop," Simon whispers, his voice shaky as he moves a hand to Ethan's thigh and the other to caress his friend's cheek.

The only thing that Ethan can think is how soft and gentle Simon's fingertips are as they run across his cheek and down to his shoulder where they curl round the top of his arm and hold him in place.

Simon presses a chaste kiss to Ethan's slightly chapped lips and breathes in heavily. It's nice, way better than he expected and he craves more, wants more, needs more.

"Tell me to stop." Simon whimpers, practically begging.

Ethan doesn't.

:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:

Hey squishy people.

What was your favourite part?

EEEEEEEEEMMMMMMOOOOOOOONNNNNN IS LYFE!

I just realised something.

Harry was tweeting, annoyed at all the one direction fangirls. Yeah?

His girlfriend is one XD I find that funny hehehe

Chapter 33 sneak peek:

'He was slipping. He could feel everything he ever worked for and wanted slipping from his grasp.

He felt as if he had been gripping onto the edge of a cliff with white knuckles and grazed palms for a long time now but he didn't move, he didn't budge out of fear of falling.

Eventually though, everything around him got too much and too fast, he could only imagine how they felt.'

Baiiiiii!!!!