Behind Closed Doors ; Mattheo x Reader

Chapter 2

TW- Anxiety, Murder, Panic Attack, Mentions of Abuse and Alcoholism, and Nightmares- 

Sorry about the last cliff-hanger lol- Love you's <3

My eyes snap open, my heart pounding, the darkness still surrounding me, "E.. Enzo" I whimper out afraid that he'll get me again. I feel hot. I'm sweating. Why am I sweating? Where the hell am I? I think to myself. 

"Enzo!", I call out a little louder this time trying to show confidence. I can't see anything but I heard a door open. I feel a little nervous and try to get up to feel for my surroundings. Whatever I'd been placed on was very soft and bouncy, it kind of felt like... a bed.

Still stuck with no idea where I was, I felt around for a light switch. Another door creaked open, this time louder as if it was right near me and then the room I was in flooded with dim light. A dark tall figure entered the room. "E.. Enzo?" I whimpered again losing any ounce of bravery that I had left. I felt so weak. I hated it. 

"Y/n?.. What's wrong? What happened?", He asks frantically, "You... you... stabbed me... where am I? What are you going to do to me? Please... Please don't hurt me again", I whimper between breaths, slowly backing away from him, my heart rate speeding up again. 

"Hey, hey, Y/n, you had another nightmare, okay, look at me, okay, hey y/n, look, we're in your dorm, in Hogwarts, okay, you're safe, breathe", he says soothingly. "In..2..3..4.. Out..2..3..4.. Just like we practiced, yeah?". I was having another panic attack, I hate this stupid nightmare. It just always seems so real and I can never do anything to stop it. 

Lorenzo's Pov

I slowly walked up to her, trying to comfort her with my voice. She kept backing away until she hit the wall. She broke into tears and slid down the wall. I hate seeing her like this, I just wish I could scoop her up into my arms and make everything okay again. I wish she'd never gone through all the stuff she has, she doesn't deserve any of it. 

"Hey Y/n, you're going to be okay, I promise", I say reassuringly while I sit down next to her and pull her into a reassuring embrace to hopefully make her feel a little better. "In..2..3..4.. Out..2..3..4.." I remind her, she slowly focuses on my voice and her breathing slows down again, and I can't help but feel bad for her. 

I want to make the nightmares go away, I want to stop all the pain she feels, I wish there was a way. 

Y/n's Pov

My breathing slows down and I catch up with reality. "I'm okay now, I remember, I'm sorry Enzo", I say apologetically, "It's okay Y/n", he reassures, "I'll always be here for you love". He always knows the right thing to say. 

It's all because of this stupid nightmare. 

It's literally the same every time, it starts off how we met, I ran into him in the rain, and we talk in the old coffee shop. I'd been adopted by the Grangers for around about a year, I got out of my old nasty house with my alcoholic and abusive father when I was 9, I hated his guts for everything he did to me. He'd been abusing me since I was 5 maybe more but I don't remember much from before then and when I met Enzo I was turning 11 soon, we've been best friends since.

It brought my father pleasure to know that I was in pain, I wanted him dead so much, no matter how much I tried to forget him, I couldn't. I had enough so I flipped the switch and went back to my old home a year after not seeing my parents, and I snapped that filthy muggle's neck. Then I run away and meet Enzo, we talk, then the nightmare begins and he stabs me in the end. It's the exact same every time. It makes me hurt. I feel so weak all the god damn time. I hate it so much.

I love Enzo so much for everything he's done for me and helped me with, I just wish I could open up and tell him everything. I'm just afraid. I don't want him to think I'm a monster. I don't want him to be scared of me. I just want to be more bold. As a matter of fact, I'm sick of my anxiety taking over, I'm done feeling weak, I don't care how long it takes but I will get this under control.