Jackie Dunphy

Coal digger

"Mom can I have $40 for lunch?" Haley asked as she entered the kitchen.

"$40?" Claire aked with a questioned look on her face.

"I also need a book for school." Haley added.

"Since when could you read?" Jackie asked grumpily as she entered the kitchen. Haley glared at her.

"That's actually a relevant question!" Alex piped in.

"Ignore them, what book?" Claire asked.

"I want a dress" Haley sighed after not being able to think of a single book title.

"Do you have any idea what a bad liar you are?" Claire smiled.

"I'd be more worried that she couldn't come up with a single book title" Alex said and turned her attention back to her homework. Jackie nodded in agreement.

"Luke come on we're late!" Phil shouted at his son as he entered the kitchen.

"There's a first. Inside-out and backwards." Claire said sipping at her coffee.

"At least he didn't zip it in to his..." Jackie paused. "You know what? I'm done" she said continuing eating.

*

"Hi, hi, hi, hi, hi! How are you doing?" Jay greeted in a hurry.

"Let me guess, the game's on." Claire asked when Jay was done greeting everyone.

"Just started" he answered.

"Hey, for you." Phil said handing over a bottle of vine to Gloria. "It's nice to see you, Gloria."

"Two times today" she laughed.

"Okay" Phil said going in for a hug.

"Uh Phil, she means we've seen them two times today" Claire interupted.

"Okay everybody. The foods in there, the drinks are in there, I'll be in here." Jay said hurriedly.

"Hold on Jay I think we should adress the elephant in the room." Phil began. "Luke, Manny, bring it in."

The two boys stood up and reluctantly walked towards the table were Phil was standing.

"Come on. Huddle up. Football." Phil said looking at Jay. "Now in light of what happened at school today, do you have any feelings you'd like to express? I think this is the proper forum to do just that-."

"For god sakes" Jay interrupted impatiently. "Both of you. Now, in this family, do we kick and punch each other or do we love each other?" He asked the two boys.

"Love each other" they answered in unison.

"That's right" Jay said slapping them on the back of the head. "I'll be in the den"

"Hate to break it to you dad, but I like grandpas way of handeling that way more" Jackie said patting her father on the shoulder. "I'm gonna go and watch football now"

*

"I like football. Haley hates it. Which is weird, because it's all boys and no reading required." Alex rambled as she entered the room. "Do you know she spends at least 45 minutes every morning doing her hair?" She asked.