Driver's License

Chapter 9 - Sidewalks we crossed

"So, How are you now??"

Without hesitation I said.. "I think I'm going crazy, Fifi."

"And why is that??"

I took a deep breath before answering her. "I dreamed of Tristan. It felt so real but then I woke up. I also keep on seeing him around."

She nods while writing something on her note pad. "Tell me about your dream." there I started to tell her everything.

"I can see na you're very happy there. Your smile never left your face while telling me about the dream."

I nodded. Everytime I remember that dream I'm half happy and half sad.

"So what's the problem honey?"

"The problem here is, after that dream I can't stop thinking about him. I see him almost everywhere. The places we've been through, the cars, my front yard, my house, the sidewalks that we crossed, everywhere"

"Not only seeing him, awhile ago when I'm stuck in traffic I can hear his voice , the way we're laughing together. Over all the noise around his voice was on top.."

She shook her head.

"You're really fucked up. "

I looked at her with my forehead creased.She laughed at me. She's freaking weird and this is what I like about her. I don't feel like i'm talking to a therapist. I tried other therapist before her but I'm not this comfortable with them. With Fiona I can talk and say everything I can't tell with other people even my friends.

"I think it's time for you to enter the facility." I looked at her badly even more. "what???? what your saying are signs!"

"I don't even know why you're my therapist. You're nonsense." I rolled my eyes on her but she just laughed at me.

Well m, that's not true. Even though she talks to me like this she has been a big help for me.

"That's why I'm your favorite therapist." she winked at me. Yea that's true. "but honestly, hearing all this. I have one thing to advise as Fifi not as your therapist.."

"Make sure it's not nonsense!" she's always joking around with me.

"why don't you try dating?"

"so that?.. that's your advice? You know I can't date..."

"You can't? or you don't want to??" that made me silent. "Yes you can. You just don't want to open your heart to anyone again." she said in a serious voice. "I know it's hard for you to move on. But, why don't you try it? I know you love him so much.. SO MUCH" she really did rub it in my face aye!

"You're still young. There's still so many people."

"but I just want him" I said while pouting. "i don't want anyone else"

"You became dependent on him. He made you feel the love you wanted to feel. He cared for you like you're a fragile thing. And you are.. Trust me YOU ARE."

"But, you must know that people come and go Hailey. They can't always be by your side. It's okay to grieve, to feel the pain, to cry but what's not okay is you.." tinuro niya ako. "..giving up."

"I know you want to be with your mother but I'm 100% sure that you don't want your reunion is inside the facility right??"

I nodded. I get what she's saying.

"That's just Fifi's advice. Try dating. Free your heart honey. But, it still up to you tho."

I deep breathe.

"I'll try. I'll try"

She moved closet to me and hugged me. "Try if you're ready honey not because i or anyone said so. Don't force yourself, Hailey. You'll get through this I know that. I believe in you. Your friends believe in you."

"We just don't want you to lose yourself because of him."

she break the hug and caressed my cheeks.

"You're like a daughter that I never had"

She and her husband did not have children and since I became her client and we became comfortable with each other, she treated me like her own.

She's not really this kind of a doctor. It's only to me that she's like this. She's a very good therapist.

"I missed you, honey"

"I missed you too" I feel like a child. Even though I'm on my thirties.

"Why don't we go out for dinner? To talk more?"

"Hey! That's a good idea!"

She fixed her things and we both got out of her office. There we saw Pat sleeping.

"Hey beautiful!" I wake her up. She slowly opened her eyes and then yawn.

"Ugh! atlast!"

I laughed. They locked the clinic and then we walked to the parking lot.

"Woah! I didn't know you've got a car" Fifi said.

"I forgot to tell you! I got it like weeks ago."

"Don't worry we can talk about it over dinner. Thank God you have a car! I didn't bring mine today."

We also took Pat home first before coming to the resto.