Driver's License

Chapter 5 - I drive alone past your street

The days passed as if it's just a blink of an eye. I didn't know how I survived 3 days not going out this house. I already did what I can do inside this house but still I'm bored. I cleaned and cleaned and cleaned for the pasts 3 days. I fixed the garden, I cleaned the pool, I cleaned my car.

For the past 3 days, I've been breaking down. I cried at my parents room, my twin's room and my supposed to be little sister's room.

What Vincent said didn't also left my mind. After that day I didn't saw him again. Auntie Ven sometimes visits me and she also helped me with the garden.

The house was suffocating me so I've decided to go out for a stroll. Honestly, I don't know where to go. I don't have a right destination.

My friends were busy on their work so I'm not pestering them now. I have no other friends aside from them and my employees.

I drove to the nearest coffee shop to buy some breakfast. I bought cookies, blueberry cheesecake and two caffe macchiato. I'll visit daddy and my sibs. My twin loves blueberry cheesecake and caffe macchiato was dad's favorite. We both love coffee.

"Hi daddy! Hi twinny! Hi babygirl!" I greeted them with a big smile on my face. I missed them.

I caressed their tomb. I put the coffee for dad above it. "Dad, i bought your favorite coffee."

And then I looked at my twin. Just like what I did with dad's coffee. I put his blueber cheescake on top of his tomb. "Here I bought you your favorite cheesecake."

"Let's eat." i'm talking to them as if they will respond to me.

I'm just staring at them while eating. Thinking that they are also eating with me. I can't help but to breakdown again.

When I had the money, I made sure to build a mausoleum for them. My little sister's ash is also here.

"Miss ko na kayo." i blurted out while crying and eating my cookies. "You're so unfair! Aren't you guys missing me???? You guys don't even visit me."

"So unfair!" I'm like a kid who's whining about her lollipop.

"After ko here I'm going to visit mommy." i forced myself to smile.

I stayed there for hours. I have so many stories for daddy and Haiden. It's been a long time since I visited them. I also told dad about what Vincent said. I asked for his advice.

"I'll get going daddy, twinny. I promise i'll come often." I said and then give them a kiss. "Bye too babygirl."

It's still painful even though 10 years had passed. The pain will never go away, I just learned to live with it. I was left alone. My whole family was snatched from me. I have no cousins cuz my parents are both an only child. My grandparents are dead. I don't have someone close in my relatives.

All I have this past few years was my friends, my company and him. I thought what happened to my fam was the last one. I was afraid to let people enter my life cuz I was afraid to be left alone again. But, Tristan managed to enter my heart, mind and soul.

However, I feel like I was destined to be left alone I guess. Like my family, he made me happy and feel loved then he also left.

I tried not to cry while I was driving. I don't want to have another accident in my family tho. But, I cannot contain my tears so I pulled over to just cry my heart out.

My right hand was on my chest to calm down my heart. I do deep breathing. And when I calmed down, I wiped my tears and started the engine.

I turned on the bluetooth to play a song. At first I was vibing and grooving with the music. Until, a song that I will never ever forget, played.

It was the song he made and recorded for me. Tristan is a frustrated singer-songwriter. I always motivated him that he should let other people hear his talent. He's very good at singing and writing.

forever is a long time

but i wouldn't mind spending it

by yourside

Tell me everyday I get to wake up to that smile

I wouldn't mind it at all

I snorted with those lyrics. Well, I guess you didn't mean what you wrote in that song. Cause you said forever but here I am now driving alone past your street.

Why did you even think of passing here Hailey???

I shook my head to let him out of my thoughts. No more Tristan please.

This is the reason why I kept my self busy as always. Cuz' if I'm busy I wouldn't have the time to think of him.

I think after this week I really need to see my therapist. When my mom was put on the facility I strated to see a therapist to overcome the trauma. I guess It went well and when Tristan came I stopped seeing her cuz' I feel that I don't need it anymore. But then when he left there I started to see my therapist again.

When I arrived at the hospital, I go straight to mg mom's doctor first. I asked her kamusta si mommy. She said that mom's really improving. She was becoming less violent and more aware of her surroundings.

"Hi mommy?" I smiled at her. We are here ok the garden right now. She just stayed silent and looked at me before looking back again at what she's doing. She's painting something. "How are you??"

She didn't answer nor look back at me. I sat beside her. "Wow! You still have this artsy hands mommy!" i complimented her.

"Mommy, I have a good news! I have a license and a car now!" i excitedly said. "I finally overcome my fear. Hopefully, you also mommy."

I brushed the strand of her hair that's going through her face.

"I also visited daddy and my siblings before going here. I know you miss them too. I miss them too." i smiled sadly. "i miss you too mommy." there I cried again.

When she heard me sobbing she looked back at me watching me cry while hugging her. She was just sitting there straight with no emotions.

"Come back mommy please. I need you." I cried like a baby. "I'm tired mommy."

"Ma'am Hailey, it's time for Ma'am Olivia's rest." her nurse said.

Even if I don't want to, I needed to let go of her. I'm wiping my tears when she speak. That made my jaw dropped.

"A beautiful girl like you shouldn't be crying like that." she said without looking at me.

I froze.

My heart is beating so fast. The nurse already took mom inside. I really can't believe she spoke to me. That was the very first time for a long time! I can't help but to cry again!

My heart is so happy right now.