The Dream Potatoes | Dream SMP x OC's (DISCONTINUED)

Deep Thoughts

A/N: Going to start doing chapter names :) I hate to say it, but this chapter is based on true events. 

TW: Mentions of Cutting/Suicide

I'd been living on the run like this for days now, and my inventory was diminishing. I was going to need to move again. Dream, George, and Sapnap had passed through multiple times looking for me. I'd been able to evade them, but who knew how much longer I could. 

I packed up the few things that I had and set out deeper into the woods. I had run pretty far in but I was going to move so far that nobody would be able to find me. I walked through the dirt which now coated every one of my belongings. 

I have never been one for staying clean. It isn't entirely my fault though. I've been going through a darker point of my life. My house stayed messy, I would make as little movement as possible. When I got a text, I wouldn't reply. It was too much work. Picking up calls was too much work for me. I stay by myself almost all the time- and my wrists. They haven't exactly been okay either. Crying in the bathroom while feeling the blade along my skin made me somehow feel better. Every time I was clean, I would relapse.

I thought about my friends. Tubbo was always so happy and excited to see me. he could lift anyone's mood on any day. He was one of the reasons I even stayed around. I had thoughts about committing before but I always start thinking about him. Imagine how much of an impact this would have on him. The thought of him being sad was too much for me to handle. He was the definition of that song- what was it called- Cloud 9? (Yes I'm literally listening to it rn)

What about Tommy? He's amazing too. He was so selfless during The War for L'Manburg Independence. Cat and Mellohi were his most prized possessions. I suddenly got mad. Those discs were the reason for all of this. I wouldn't be here right now if it weren't for him. I knew I shouldn't blame him though. He was just a child, he didn't know what would happen. It wasn't his fault. If I should blame anyone, it should be Dream. Dream really was a nice guy deep down. I knew all this was just a act for- it doesn't matter.

I quickly pushed away the thought. I didn't want to be thinking about this stuff. I was too young for any of this. We all were in fact. We weren't even 18 yet. I could remember turning 13 like it was yesterday. Yet I was here making deals with the devil and doing things I could never even imagine in my wildest dreams. Betraying a nation I helped create, running for my life. 

As much as I hated to admit it, it gave me a slight thrill. I was living the fantasy life I had only ever read about. I was on the run from my greatest enemy. Well I did kind of like him at one point, but that was in a past life. That Y/n was dead and never coming back.

I was busy thinking about this when I tripped over a rock- then the world went black.

Word Count: 561

A/N: Ily and eat something <3