first love and first loss

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To the boy that was more musical than human

All song
Ginger hair
And pen ink

It was the era of you

Trading crisp paged books and VHS movies as currency for our friendship
Hearts connected across bus eiles with the delicate wires of earbuds
It was there I learned the graveyard of lyrics
Choking out words on a rainy night
Describing the park, More rust then not
How the sun set ablaze your hair
Dancing to Taylor Swift and falling in love
To young to know any better
To young they said to be swimming in the eyes of another
The same ones that call first loves pure
And darling we were anything but
As if to say that school year I learned you
And only you
Was more cyanide then euphoric
More siren then fairytale
we sipped sadness off of each other's collar bones
Exploring the excitement of free falling into someone else's problems
The first time I lost myself was when I lost you
Not knowing 2 years later my heart would still be pinning, pine box and all
It was the night that you waited with me in the warm summer air

First date
Only date
First love
And I was so sure my only love

Funny how hearts are like that sometimes
So reckless yet fragile
I hate the saying "time heals all wounds" because it's just not true
peek into my soul and you'll see more cracks then the sidewalk he left me standing on

But I have learned
To stop apologizing to myself
To turn the sad into happy
To take my first love and make it unapologetically me

Because Hugh Tully you thought me the universe of being a human
About surviving boys who wear their fathers like a costume

And singing my way through life
Because yes everything is a goddamn musical

So wherever you are
I hope you look back on 7th grade
And remember the one night we lost each other to find ourselves

So wherever you are I hope you look back on 7th grade And remember the one night we lost each other to find ourselves

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⏰ Last updated: Dec 01, 2021 ⏰

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