she wasn't okay - JJ MAYBANK // Outer Banks

THIRTEEN

Lucy stood in the line of the Charlotte airport. It had been three days since she left Outer Banks. It had been three days since she spoke the last time. She hadn't had said one more word to her mother. She betrayed her. She let her live believing she'd live a long life. She lied to her own daughter. Now Lucy knew she had two to three years left. Maybe four, but that will be miserable. Lucy didn't want that. She had lived with cancer since she was five years old. And her only hope was her brother's blood transfusion. Leukaemia was a bitch, a real bitch. It had eaten up her liver by the time she was eight. It went so fast forward the doctors thought Lucy wouldn't make it. They all watched her die. Lucy had one last chemotherapy left, when she was nine and it really helped her through. It was like a miracle. Doctors were clueless, but happy. No one would have thought that little girl would have left the hospital alive. But Lucy had to take really strong medication since that day. To keep her immune system up. Since Lucy was diagnosed with cancer she had to go to the hospital when she even had a tiny infection. Her mother tried to keep her inside. Away from everyone. But Lucy needed to go to school. Her mother wanted her to wear a mask. Lucy did, but as soon her mother was out of her sight she pulled the mask off. Lucy went out with her classmates. Her mother had no idea. After her last therapy Lucy got medical weed on prescription. She started selling some of it at school and or some new drugs she tired. But the medical weed mix with some of her cancer medication were the best sells she ever made. After Lucy learned she could live a long happy life with a blood transfusion from a biological sibling she started looking for John B. Her mother didn't know about that. Lucy read the papers the doctor gave her mum. Lucy had no clue how ill she really was until she read the papers. It wasn't the first time her mother lied to her about her health. Lucy hated being lied to. Everyone does. But when your life depends on it you kind of stop talking to your own mother and try live your own life. As happy as you can. That was when Lucy put one and one together. What her mother said about 5 percent surviving the blood transfusion.

"It wasn't in the papers." Lucy whispered.

"What?" Her mum didn't understand a word.

"It wasn't in the papers." Lucy said louder. "What you said at The Chateau. None of it was written down in the papers. My release papers from the hospital. You only said it to pull the rug out from under me. The surprise moment. You took me by surprise and I believed you."

Now Lucy's mother was the surprised one. She looked at her daughter in disbelieve. "You read the papers?"

"Of course I did. Years ago. That's how I found out about my brother. Well I found the picture first, but didn't think about it." Lucy looked at her mother. "Why do you keep lying to me? Don't you want me to live a healthy life?" The look on her mother's face said it all. She didn't. Lucy heart sunk to the ground. Her mother didn't want her to be healthy. Lucy's eyes filled with tears. "If you don't want me to be healthy, why do you want me to come back to England?" Her mother didn't say a word. "Control. You want to see how I feel. You want to control my life. You always have!"

Her mother chuckled. "God, you are so naive. Do really think I don't know about your sneaking out at night, pulling off your mask as soon you don't see me anymore or even your little drug selling. It all helps me."

"Help you with what? To get rid of me?" Lucy's face showed nothing, but disbelieving. Her own mother. The woman who showed her to tie her shoes. The woman who taught to ride a bike. The woman who dried her tears.

"I never wanted children. I left Outer Banks to get away from it, only to find out I have another brat in the oven. You. You evil little thing. Ruining my body all over again. I was a model before I had children. I could do whatever the fuck I want before I had children. I had money! I had my own life."