Ramé

Kairosclerosis

(n.) the moment you realize that you're currently happy 一consciously trying to savor the moment

Tour had ended a week ago and that meant Otto had to pull himself up by his bootstraps and get back on the road. Except, this time, Otto was actually looking forward to getting on the plane because it meant he was going to see his boyfriend . And Otto hadn't been able to say that since right before the Double Dare tour. And even then, it hadn't been Awsten .

Needless to say he was excited.

Too excited for his own good, he woke up at four even though he needed to leave his house around six thirty. Whatever. He double checked his suitcase, made a protein shake that he could barely stomach, and vacuumed his living room. What the hell was he doing ?

Part of him wanted to text Awsten but the other part of him knew there was no point. On one hand, if he sent a text now, Awsten would have a cute good morning I miss you text to wake up to. On the other hand, was that too clingy? Awsten liked his space, so who was Otto to disturb that space?

"God, I miss you," Otto muttered, lying flat on his bed and feeling nothing but sorry for himself.

"One more day, Otto." He could practically hear the eyeroll. But he also heard the smile, so he'd take it. "And, since Lucas isn't making us sleep on that damn bus..."

Otto sat up, a small smile on his lips. "What about it, Awsten?"

Awsten laughed. "You're gonna make me beg?"

"I'm just lost," he teased.

"God, you're the worst! All I'm saying is we should probably share a room. Y'know, because of reasons."

Otto hummed, thinking to himself. "Aws, I enjoy being with you, like, a lot, but we just got back together and sharing a bed-."

Awsten laughed. "No, no! I already talked to Lucas. It's gonna be two rooms with two beds in them. No bed sharing. I'm just saying since we're a thing, it would be nice since I know we'll be up talking anyways."

"We never get rooms with the two beds. It's always been-."

"One room," Awsten agreed. "I might've been able to pull some strings. Something about better sleep meaning better performances, I don't know"

Otto's heart melted. "You're kinda the best."

Awsten muttered something dismissive that Otto didn't quite catch but got the jist of. "You still haven't said yes."

"I haven't?"

"Fuck off," Awsten laughed.

Otto let a stupid smile that was way too much teeth absorb his face. "Yeah, I guess I'll share a room with you."

"I can hear you smiling," Awsten said softly. Otto just shushed him. "Okay, it's almost midnight over there and you have to wake up at five."

Otto just sighed. "Time zones suck."

"Hey, at least you get to go to sleep!"

"You always sleep in late. It's only fair."

Awsten just made a noncommittal noise. "I'll see you tomorrow at, like, noon."

Twelve hours. Otto just sighed. It wasn't like he couldn't go twelve hours without Awsten. He'd gone years without Awsten. But after a week of having him back for real, he got nervous. He didn't want to lose him again and even though Otto knew that things were fine and they were really good, that little part of his brain just wouldn't stop telling him that something had to be wrong.