Ramé

Nighthawk

(n.) a recurring thought that only seems to strike you late at night

"I still can't believe you guys managed to date for, like, a whole year before finally deciding to tell us," Jawn grumbled, as Awsten and Otto went to retreat to the guest room Geoff had prepared for them.

Otto laughed. "To be fair, four of those months were, like, a really long time ago."

Jawn shook his head, pouting. "Don't wanna hear it."

"Okay, okay, see you guys in the morning," Awsten cut them short, tugging his boyfriend by the hand to their room. "Jesus," he muttered.

"Never thought I'd say it, but, in Jawn's defense," Otto said, making Awsten cackle, "we did only just now tell them because we wanted to share a room."

Awsten just made a noncommittal noise while pulling off his shirt. "I figured I'd let them get used to me being bi before we threw something else at them. This trip just snuck up on me."

Otto rolled his eyes. "Whatever. I'm just saying, I don't blame them."

"What!" Geoff shouted. "Since when?"

Awsten looked over warily at Otto. "Since the last day of tour, I guess," Otto didn't like that Geoff sounded semi angry. "We didn't mean to not tell you. Things just got... Crazy." Geoff was currently sat down on the table in front of Otto and Awsten and about a thousand miles away. The speaker of the phone went in and out as he took in the information they had just dumped on him.

After a second, Geoff responded. "Well, shit. I guess that's one less bed to make," he muttered, his voice cracking over the phone. Otto let out a breath. "I'm happy for you guys, don't get me wrong. Just surprised."

"We appreciate it, man," Awsten said, taking the phone from Otto. "Now we just gotta tell Jawn."

Static burst out of the phone as Geoff laughed. "That'll be a real problem. Jawn wants to know everything immediately anyways. He's gonna be pissed."

Otto stood and walked away. Buzzwords like problem and pissed bounced around his head. It wasn't that he was anxious necessarily (he was), but he didn't like to let people down. Not only that, but he was tired because he'd been running errands all day

The buzzwords brought back memories of late nights of feeling like a disappointment throughout high school. He waited patiently for Awsten to come into his room, almost nodding off a few times. Finally, at about one, he made an appearance. "You okay?"

"Tired," Otto muttered, burying himself deeper under the covers.

"Hm. Seems like bullshit, but I'll let it slide because it's late and I know you were stressed about the call." Otto rolled his eyes, but let Awsten kiss his cheek before changing into sweats. "But we're talking tomorrow then."

Otto pulled Awsten down next to him and sighed. "I just- I guess I'm not as over high school as I thought."

Awsten nodded. "Okay, expand on that."

More recently, Otto had started seeing a therapist to sort out what the fuck went on during his childhood and even a little bit of adulthood. Everything from figuring out he was gay to high school fist fights to how being in the spotlight wasn't always the best in regards to his mental health. Awsten had been very supportive but a little confused. Otto found him passed out on his couch researching how to better support him. Expand on that was his current favorite way of telling Otto that he had no clue what the fuck he meant.

Smiling softly, Otto obliged. "Like, okay, you know the buzzwords?"

"Oh shit, did he use them?"