The Victim

29| the victim of love

Serine

***

"I wanna go home,"

"Me too, I'm tired,"

"Correction, fucking tired,"  I sit down on the nearest bench and I sigh. It was hot. And when it is hot, unexpectedly, my energy drains faster than it usually does. I slapped my palm onto my forehead as I pant like I ran somewhere. I began feeling a movement on my belly and I knew I had  a huge appetite.

Only for me to spill my guts later.

"I need to eat? I just- someone? Anybody?"

"You need to eat someone?"  I somehow find the energy to glare at Levine as she shrugs. "What?" I shake my head and look back up the ceiling. "Did someone make an order?" I narrow my eyes and spot a tray of food in front of me. I look up to the person who had the tray in hand and like a fool, I  unintentionally grin. "Life. Saver babe." The second I said that, all eyes were on me.

My eyes slightly widen, "That was, a total mistake." I realize. "You just called him 'babe'."  I look to the person who had just said that.

Thank you so much Sarah.

I sigh, giving up-  not having the energy to argue "Can we all go to the cafeteria please?" I say ignoring absolutely everything. I stand up and make my way to our table. I drop my bag somewhere near my chair and the moment I open my eyes, I see the same tray of food.  I look up to him once again and whispered a 'thank you' as he sat down next to me. He kissed my cheek before asking, "You okay?"

"I'm hanging in there." he kisses my temple as I automatically land my head on his shoulder. He wraps his one arm around me, brushing my arm gently. "Aren't you hot?" I mutter. "I'll survive,"

"This is not only strange but adorably cute." Sarah says.

"Oh my gosh, eww guys," I mutter once again and  grabbed the fork to begin eating my pasta. "That's my little sister, bro,"  says David who has been awfully quiet these past few days.

"I'm not little." I glare. "Back to what I was saying," he ignores me and I shake my head, not surprised. "she's my little sister Alex. If you hurt her, you better know what's coming." I chuckle softly. "You're too much. And you still  don't want to admit that you love me."

"I won't."

"Okay can we chill with the serious talk?" By the time I say that, I notice my plate is empty. Clean and empty.

Shit.

I then start to feel so grossed out and then remember why I don't eat that much. Ugh, why Serine? Why today of all days, stupid!

I notice Alex was seconds away from being done with his meal but that doesn't change me feeling sick. Sarah is the first to notice and before she can even try to whisper something to me, I stand up to leave. I don't look back even though I can hear them calling my name. I rush out the cafeteria and make my to the bathroom.

"Fuck." I mutter once I made it inside, shoving a laxative down my throat as I pray it kicks in as fast as I think it will.

I push the silver colored bathroom door open and immediately I fall at my feet as I force myself to gag. I stick my index finger at the back of my throat and due to me feeling nauseous, it was automatic and came out rather it's own way. I found myself dropping my head inside the toilet and spilled half of my guts out. It kept coming little by little until I heard a knock on the door. "Ser?" I recognized the voice. "Don't come in." I warn.

"You know we're not gonna listen right?"

The girls were both here.

"Babe  we're coming in,"

***

I find myself taking off the black helmet and getting off his bike. "Thank you," I smile a not-so-real smile. He doesn't say anything but just stares at me. "What happened today?" my breathe hitches. I didn't feel right telling him just yet. It was just too soon. I wasn't ready. "Girl stuff," I shrug and he nods.

Did he buy it?

"I was really worried," he says softly and guilt passes through me. I give him another half-hearted smile and take his hand in mind. "It was nothing." I lie once again.

Shout at me or simply give a blank stare. I know.

It wasn't healthy beginning a relationship with lies already. But I wasn't ready to open up about anything just yet. "When you're ready, I won't pressure you." he whispers and I melt.

Guess he didn't buy it.

He gets off his bike, his helmet off and his grey eyes looking right into my brown ones. He walks closer  and as soon as he's close enough, he spreads his arms wide open for me to fall into his toxic scent. I hug him ad he hugs me back.  "Goodnight, sleep well and think about me.", I chuckle.

"Could you love yourself any less?"

"I could never." he says. "I would need to love myself to love you."  I freeze.

Love.

No,

It was too soon.

Way too soon.

^^^^

Alexander

She was gone but I still found myself in the same spot she left me in. 

Why would you say that idiot? You scared her off!

You could never erase your past.

Something simply told me not to leave. Something told me to stay. I've been sitting on my motorbike, too paralyzed to start it and make my way home. I look down at my phone and it reads 4:30 pm. Thirty minutes; I was sitting, contemplating if I should go and call her.

Just go.

And I find myself on her door step. I knock on the foyer but  nobody seems to respond. I suddenly feel the strong urge to see her, so I knock once again.  Nothing.

I frown but take a few steps back. What if she was sleeping? She seemed pretty tired today.

But something insides me refuses to believe that. Without thinking, I push the door and let myself in. I step into her house and I remember the last time I only took one step in, was when she called the ambulance for her father.  This time I let my legs do it's own thing as I don't have time to observe the big house. I hear a sound from upstairs that I'm not able to make out and the  curiosity kills me. I hurriedly make my way upstairs and I come face to face with doors.

How would I know which one is her room?

I sigh turning to the one on the left and open it. She wasn't inside and It certainly wasn't a bedroom.

I close the door and spot one with a small sign on it, and as if the universe was sending me a sign, it wrote; SSW, which was her full name initials. I allowed myself to walk towards her room.

I knock once I was in front of her door and simply await her to open the door. She doesn't.

I barge in and find her room empty- where was she?

I then heard a cry in the direction of another door in her room that was closed.  I walk towards it, once I open the door, I freeze.