She Has Fire

Chapter 19

Negan's POV

I stood in the doorway of the bathroom, watching Mary's breaths. She was sound asleep at one in the afternoon. It had been three days since Carl had made the worst mistake of his life. He was sitting in a cell eating dog food. Mary was constantly sleeping now. I think she sleeps so much so she doesn't have to worry, can't worry when your asleep. Or at least not outright. Keeps telling me about the weird dreams she has. All anxiety dreams. She won't talk about Carl. She knows something has to be done. I know. I don't want to, but I have to punish the kid. I sighed as I walked over and crouched down near the bed. I rubbed her back slightly.
"Sugar..." I whispered as she started to move. She groaned, not fully waking.
"Mary...I need you to wake up for a second." I sighed. She moaned and opened her eyes. She looked me up and down and sighed.
"We gotta talk. It's been three days. I have to do something. I'm going down to talk to him now." I told her.
"Just...don't...kill him." Her voice cracked. I brushed the hair from her face, cupping her cheek.
"Of course I won't. I'll punish him and send him back." I told her and stood.
"Negan!" She cried bolting upright, "you're going to hurt him?" She asked.
"Sugar, I gotta." I sighed and started walking for the door. I heard her feet hit the ground and turned on a dime.
"Negan, please! Don't." She said rushing towards me. I ran forward, catching her arms.
"You gotta get back in bed. Carson said you shouldn't get out of bed." I told her. I didn't want to fight her. The tears were forming in her eyes. She was going to make this as hard as possible. She was so fucking pale. I hate this. I hate it.
"We can do something else! Like...um...make him work! He can do all the shitty jobs!" She rambled. I hung my head.
"Sugar, you know that isn't going to work. I won't kill him, I won't make it too bad. But I can't let him work here. I can't just let him go." I told her. The tears falling down her face. Dammit.
"He's...he's my brother...I don't want him hurt..." She sobbed. I wrapped her up in my arms. I picked her up and carried her back to bed. I laid her down and knelt by the bedside.
"You need to rest." I told her.
"Negan, please. Please don't do this."
"Sugar, I wish I didn't have to." I told her.
"We can think of something else!" She cried. It was breaking my heart, I hung my head so she wouldn't see the tears in my eyes.
"I have to do this. Please don't make this any harder." I said.
"Negan, he's a kid! He's stupid!"
"Sugar, he stopped being a kid when he shot that gun."
"Don't, please don't do this!" She cried. I held her face in my hands, tears stinging my eyes.
"I love you Sugar." I told her and I got up and started for the door.
"Negan! Negan don't!" She yelled after me. I closed the door and could still hear her sobs. It fucking hurt. It pissed me off, this kid did this. He killed my people. He almost took our baby from us! Now he's making me do this to her! I started walking, when I saw Angela coming down the hall.
"Angela, do me a favor?" I asked her. She turned to look at me confused.
"Um, depends on the favor..." She said. I sighed and shook my head.
"Not like that. Mary is really upset. Can you keep her company? You're one of the best friends she's got here. I doubt she'd want Joey sitting with her and I don't have time to find Aaron." I sighed.
"Oh. Yeah. Is this about Carl?"
"Yes. I'm heading down to deal with him now. She's not happy about it. She...she was getting really worked up. I don't want her alone like that, not with everything that's happened." I cleared my throat, trying to disguise any wobble in my voice.
"Okay. Go, do what you have to. I'll be with her." She nodded.
"Listen...if after this, she doesn't want to see me, would you stay with her. Like, be her roommate?"
"Negan, my room isn't-"
"No, you'd stay in our room. She needs to be comfortable."
"Yeah. I will. But she knows you don't want to do this. She knows this has to happen. She'll forgive you." Angela said before walking away. I wasn't so sure.
I walked up to the door Simon stood in front of. This was going to suck. I knew the kid was going to fight, make it hard.
"He been eating or starving himself?" I asked.
"Not a bite. Forced water down his throat this morning. He's been throwing himself against the door. Had Carson come stitch up a gash on his forehead." Simon said. I sighed and nodded.
"Let's get this over with." Simon swung the door open and I walked in. The kid was huddled in the corner.
"Kept his clothes on. Didn't think you'd want it otherwise."
"Damn right. He's a murderer, but he's still a fucking kid." I growled walking towards him. He didn't look at me. Didn't speak. Nothing.
"You kill my men, you beat my wife, and you won't even look at me. FUCKING LOOK AT ME YOU PIECE OF SHIT!!!" I screamed, rage filled every part of me. He lifted his head and glared at me.
"Much better." I laughed. I crouched down in front of him. He hated me. I hated him.
"Now, kid. If you had just killed my men, I wouldn't have as much of a problem, Hell! I was a little impressed! But here's the thing, you hurt Mary. That, that is a big no-no. That is a huge mistake!" I growled.
"She deserved it. Being here with you after all you've done." He spat.
"You have no idea the deep shit you are in, do you?" I said.
"Just kill me. I don't care! I tried to kill you, I'll keep trying!" He yelled.
"Hurt me, try to kill me all you fucking want, kid. But when you put Mary in harm's way, that is when I have a problem."
"You'll all fall one day. Mary too." He said.
"Just keep digging that hole. Your sister is pregnant. She was pregnant when you threw her to the ground and beat her. She bled because of you. We almost lost....You hurt her, you hurt my baby! DO YOU GET IT NOW!?!?" I screamed. A look of shock came over his face. I didn't know if he regretted that he hurt the baby and Mary or if it was just the fucking fact she was pregnant with my baby.
"Is...did...she..." He mumbled.
"She is still pregnant, despite your stupidity. That's my fucking kid in there, you think they're going down easy? Naw." I smiled.
"I want to see her. I don't believe you. I want to see her, hear it from her."
"Nope. I have to punish you." I stood.
"Let me see her!" He jumped up. I landed a hit to his ribs.
"Sit the fuck down." I growled. He stumbled back against the wall. I took the knife from my belt.
"You can keep still and this won't hurt too bad, or you can try and fight me and make it worse." I told him. He looked to the ceiling as I pushed his shoulder into the wall, Simon grabbing the other one. I put the knife on his cheek and pulled down. Blood falling where my knife cut. I cut from below his eye down to the middle of his cheek. He didn't make a sound.
"Carson get in here!" Simon yelled. Carson came running in with his med bag.
"Stitch him up. Not too good. We want that to scar." I smiled. Carson stitched his face up.
"It's deep. It was going to scar anyway." Carson lowered his head and left.
"I want to see Mary. I want to hear it from her mouth." Carl growled.
"You want to see her? Fine! We'll go fucking see her and you can apologize!! You can beg for her forgiveness!" I grabbed him by the collar and stomped out of the cell. We stomped up the stairs and down the hall to our door.
"You say anything I deem unacceptable and I will rain pain down on you." I growled. I slammed the door open, Mary jumped up in bed. Angela dropped the book she was reading. I brought Carl into the middle of the room and kicked him to his knees.
"He doesn't believe me. He thinks I'm lying about you being pregnant when he beat you." I was seething. Mary looked from me to Carl.
"It's true. It's true...you...you almost took my baby from me..." Her voice quivered. Carl's face fell, he hung his head.
"You hurt her. You made her bleed. Then you tell me, you don't regret hurting her, that she'll fall one day. That you won't stop trying to kill me. You got balls kid. But I could kill you right now with my bare fucking hands! I won't. You should thank Mary for that. You should beg for her to forgive you!" I screamed.
"If...if I had known I wouldn't have hurt you. But I don't regret killing those men. Not for a second." He said. I backhanded him.
"Carl, I hate you right now. I probably always will. Just like you will always hate me. You're my brother, but know that if you try to hurt my baby or Negan EVER again, I won't hesitate to kill you." Mary growled from her bed.
"That's my fucking mama bear! Simon!" Simon came in and grabbed the kid.
"We're sending you home. Put him in the trunk, do whatever you want. Just get him home alive." I waved Simon off. He dragged Carl from the room. Silence fell across the room. I wasn't sure what I was in for.
I wasn't thinking. I was beyond anger, beyond rage, and I did a stupid stunt. Did everything to hurt him. I didn't think how it would hurt Mary. Now that it was fading, I realized how stupid I was. I looked up at her, kneeling on the bed. She looked at me, but I didn't see anger. Her face scrunched up and she fell back onto the bed, sobs wracking her body.
"Shit." I sighed. I went to the foot of the bed, just stood there.
"Um, Angela. Could you have someone bring us up some dinner. She'll need to eat soon." I cleared my throat.
"Yeah, sure thing." She glared at me. I messed up. Now my soon-to-be wife was sobbing and my ex-wife was pissed. Great. Angela walked over and knelt by Mary's head.
"Mary? I'm going to get you some food. I'll be back. Do you want anything specific?"
"Chips. Pickles." Mary sniffled.
"Alright. I'll be back." Angela stood and walked up next to me.
"You better beg for her forgiveness." She hissed and left. She was right. I fucking hated it when she was right. I kicked my boots off and climbed into bed beside her, wrapping my arms around her.
"I'm sorry. I was a hate filled fucking idiot. You didn't deserve that." I whispered to her.
"I didn't. But he needed to hear that. I needed to say it. But, if you ever pull something like that again, you'll be finding a new wife." she said.
"Understood." I said pulling her close. She turned to face me.
"You are an idiot. But I love you still." She sighed.
"You're the best human on this planet. Thank you. I love you." I pulled her into a kiss.
"How are you feeling?" I asked.
"Tired. Hungry. But fine. No bleeding. Just have to keep it up for the next eight months." She said. I nodded, my hand sitting on her belly.
"They are going to be such a badass. Just like their mama."
"Just like their papa." She smiled. We held onto each other and unintentionally fell asleep. We were woken by a knock on the door.
"Shit." I grumbled shitting up. Mary started getting up, I waved her down.
"It's the food, I'll get it." I stood and walked to the door. I opened it surprised to see Aaron with two trays of food.
"Oh. Thought Angela was bringing it up." I grumbled.
"Should I go get her?" He asked.
"What? No. Put it on the table. Mary, It's-"
"Aaron!" She was suddenly behind me and taking the trays from him and putting them down. He engulfed her in a hug.
"I wanted to bring it up. I wanted to see how you were doing." He smiled.
"You could just come see me. You don't need to bring me food to do that." She laughed.
"I wasn't sure the protocol."
"Dude, you know her. You can just come see her. I don't give a fuck." I sighed sitting down at the table.
"I'll let you eat, I still have some work to finish up in the garden. I'll come by tomorrow. You look good." He smiled, hugged her and left. Mary sat across from me.
"Why didn't you tell him about Carl?" I asked.
"He doesn't need to know. He's been through enough, being kicked out. Let him live in blissful ignorance for as long as he can." She said as she ate. I watched her for a moment. She was fucking incredible.
"You're a badass you know." I told her. She looked up, a bit of pickle hanging out the side of her mouth.
"Mmhmm. I know." She said threw a mouthful of food. I laughed and went back to eating.
"Negan, I want to get married." She said, pushing her tray away.
"We are Sugar. I got you that nice ring to prove it." I smiled.
"No, like tomorrow or soon at least. Before the baby is here. It just...it feels like something we should do before the baby is here." She said. I looked at her for a second, took a sip of water and leaned back in my chair.
"Okay. We can get married whenever you want. Just thought you wanted something nice."
"Kind of. I don't know. I just want to be married to you. It'd be nice to get dressed up, but we'll never find nice clothes. Besides, I'll start ballooning soon and I won't fit anything. The priority when comes to clothes are maternity clothes and baby clothes not a wedding dress." She said in one breath.
"Um, well okay. You want a preacher or what?"
"I was never religious, I sure as shit ain't now." She snorted.
"Okay. Well, then we can do it now." I said.
"Now?" She looked surprised and confused. I got up and went to my dresser and pulled a velvet box out.
"I told Simon to hit a jewelry store a while ago, start looking for wedding rings. He brought these back." I showed her the platinum rings. A simple band for me and a ring that looked like a branch with flowers blooming for her. People say I'm not romantic. I got romance coming out my asshole.
"It's beautiful. But don't we need someone to officiate or something?" She asked.
"Sugar it is the end of the world. We can do as we damn well please." I smiled.
"You sure?"
"I already call you my wife. Mind as well." I smiled.
"But you don't have vows written."
"Sugar, I can think of a million things to say to you. I don't need to write it down. It'll be a mess, but it'll be nice. Do you want this? It seems like you're looking for an out here."
"No! I want to. I don't want an out." She smiled.
"Good, 'cause you're outs went out the window once that little guy happened." I pointed to her belly making her laugh. I reach out and held her hand.
"Mary Grimes, you are the baddest lady I have ever met. You drive me crazy and I fucking love it. I was surviving when we met, but now I'm living. You are a fucking ray of sunshine. I swear to you that I will always keep you and our baby safe. I'll never hurt you, on purpose. If I make you mad or sad, I swear to do everything to make up for it. I fucking love you, Sugar." I slipped the ring on her finger I could see the tears in her eyes. She picked up my hand, it looked huge in hers.
"Negan, You are insane. You're brilliant, and funny and charming. You frustrate me, but I still love you. You trust me to take care of me. You let me fight. You have given me a future to look forward to for the first time since the world ended. You gave me the most amazing, unexpected gift. I will do my best to keep our family safe and happy. I love you." She said, tears falling down her face as she put the ring on my finger.
"I think this is the part where we kiss." I cleared my throat. I pulled her into a kiss, I ran my hands up the back of her neck, tangling in her hair. I felt her fingers take hold of locks and pull me in deeper. We released as we ran out of air.
"That was special Sugar." I smiled. She smiled, but it quickly fell as she jumped to her feet and ran to the bathroom, clearly vomiting.
"I mean, we just got married and I already make her vomit. I'm sure that's a good sign." I got up and went to the bathroom and pulled the hair from her face. She cleaned up and looked at me like a kicked puppy.
"Negan, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to puke after our kiss." She sighed.
"Sugar, it's fine. Let's just think of it as our little guy got too excited and made you puke." I chuckled.
"I like that. That was a good kiss." She wrapped her arms around my waist.
"It was, a fucking great kiss." I hummed.
"Too bad Carson said no sex for a while or you'd be getting some right about now." She turned and walked away.
"Cold. Mean and cold." I said. She laughed. We crawled into bed and got close, as close as we could. I started kissing her neck, when there was a banging at the door.
"Oh this better be fucking good." I growled as I got up and threw my pants back on. I ripped the door open.
"What!?" I barked. Simon stood in front of me, he was bruised and bloody.
"Jesus, Simon! What the fuck happened?" I asked.
"Rick. Rick fucking happened. Boss he's here. He put a damn gun to my head. He's outside the gates." He huffed.
"Just him?" I asked as I put my shirt back on and grabbed my boots.
"Rick's here? Why? What does he want?" Mary asked as she got out of bed and started putting leggings on under her nightgown.
"Don't know. But he's pissed after we brought his kid back." Simon sighed.
"If he pulls anything I'm going to fucking burst!" I growled throwing my jacket on and grabbing Lucille.
"I'm coming." Mary wrapped a sweatshirt around herself.
"Sugar, don't. It won't end well." I told her.
"I might be the only one he'll actually listen to." She right. I nodded and we all ran down to the front. I walked out to the edge of the platform at the top of the stairs and saw Rick standing in his truck bed.
"Prick! The fuck you want? I'm on my motherfucking honeymoon!" I smiled. I saw him tense.
"You're going to pay for what you did to my boy!" He growled.
"Look at you! You're deranged! I have a fucking army! It's just you! You think you can get anywhere here?" I laughed.
"I want Mary home! I'm tired of this! She belongs with us!" Rick yelled.
"I belong where I'm happy! I'm happy with him, I'm happy here!" Mary said.
"He cut your brother's face! He's killed our people!" Ricked growled.
"Carl did this to my face!" Mary growled pointing to her swollen, bruised face, stitches in one eyebrow.
"He hit me, he knocked me to the ground! I almost lost my baby because of him! He got off lightly!" She growled. Rick's face grew angrier.
"Come home. We'll help you. You'll be safe." Rick said.
"I'm safe here. I have a doctor here. I won't die like mom here." She said.
"She would be so disappointed."
"In me or you?" Mary said.
"That's my lady!" I hollered.
"This is a big mistake." Rick growled before he jumped back in his truck and drove off.
"Angela!" I called across the yard. She came running up.
"I need you to take Mary back to the room. Remember to get her to drink water. I need to go talk to Simon." Angela nodded.
"Don't talk about me like I'm not here." Mary spat.
"I'm sorry, Sugar. You need to hydrate. You're vomiting so much you're going to have no water left. I won't be long. I promise. Simon!" I started walking down the halls.
"Boss? What are we going to do?" He asked.
"You're going to build an escape tunnel out of this place. We're going to make a safe house. I have a feeling Rick the Prick will be back with friends. He'll need time to plan. So will we. Our first priority is a tunnel out of here and some place safe for Mary."