Start from scratch

Chapter 45 - The Bold

Disclaimer: The show Victorious, its characters and other associated copyrights are property of someone else and not me.

Start from Scratch.

Chapter 45 – The Bold

Tori's POV.

Tori's POV

It's early may, spring has arrived and the weather is once again turning warm. It's as if the world is waking up from a deep sleep. It's been a month since we declared our love for each other. Other than an occasional fight, which is normal, things are wonderful. Jade in private, is very affectionate and tender. For the first time in her life, she knows true love and I know she loves to express it. I of course return the favor. In public she's slightly a different animal, but even then, when we're out or when she'd telling me, I'm the most annoying person on the planet, I see the love in her eyes.

We have one hurdle left. The physical act of making love. With Beck it was never making love, it was sex. Jade has told me, as a result of her therapy sessions with Dr. Cortez she realized, that to her, sex, was about power and violence. It still aches my heart, to know that he violated her. He's locked up now and will not get out for a very long time if ever. But the nightmares continue.

She wants to be with me. I want to be with her. We both want to express our love for each other in the most intimate way possible. I know that our touching exercises have helped. Recently, Jade in addition to touching me has started to occasionally kiss the part of me she had just touched. I love it and do the same for her. Our sessions are beginning to look more and more life foreplay.

I feel as if we're building up to making love. I however, let Jade take the lead. We will only be together, when she's comfortable with it. I'd never dare think of pressuring her and I won't.

As much as she wants to make love, the prospect of it, terrifies her. We've spoken of it several times. The fear is a lot of things, fear of having a flash back, fear of not being able to perform as a lover and probably a hundred other things.

I'll admit that I'm a bit fearful as well. I love her and am afraid of hurting her. Ever since that day I caused a flashback, without meaning to, I am very aware just how easy it is to bring the terrible past back into the present.

I'll wait, as long as it takes. Even if she finds she never can. I'll love her no less.

It was Saturday and I was at work at the playpen. Earlier today, Jade and I, did some grocery shopping, where we bickered over spaghetti sauce, then we cleaned the apartment, where we bickered over my choice of cleaning products for the bathroom, followed by us cuddling on the couch watching the WWII movie, 1961's The Guns of Navarone. Jade really wanted to see it as it was directed by the same person who directed one of her favorite horror films, 1981's Happy Birthday to me. That movie wasn't actually that bad, with some action, some good suspense and a bit of mystery.

Once the movie was over, I readied for work, kissed Jade and headed out to start work at 6:00 PM. Just before 8:00 Pm, my boss Stacy came up. She's the head waitress and my immediate supervisor.

"Tori, I messed up with the schedule and put too many people on. Angeletta is coming in a few minutes. My mistake. So, take the rest of the night off. "

"Sure?" I said with a bit of surprise.

"Go ahead. It's fine. Enjoy the night"

"Thanks." I said before heading to the changing room.