Henchman (JOKER X READER) ✅

chapter 8: recovery

i don't ever wanna drink again... i just, ooh, i just need a friend, i'm not gonna spend ten weeks, have everyone think i'm on the mend

author's note: this chapter contains mentions of trauma, panic attacks, and depression

—-

You didn't register anything after that.

Frost told you, afterwards, that he had to pry your fingers off of the gun himself and essentially drag you out of the asylum. You had been practically comatose, but your eyes had remained open the whole time. But you weren't seeing anything.

The next thing you clearly remember is vomiting into your toilet two days later. It had all really caught up to you by then, the numbness receding just enough so that you felt physically ill. Frost was there for some of that, too, and once, you heard him shouting at someone right outside your door. You hadn't asked him about it yet, and you weren't sure you wanted to.

You had completely and utterly lost control. In your desperate desire to make the doctor stop making you feel more guilty for what you were doing, you'd lashed out. And not just once, either. Bile climbed up your throat at just the thought of it.

And it had invaded your dreams, too. You woke up more than once to the sounds of your own screams, watching your dream self shoot the doctor repeatedly, powerless to stop it.

Don't, he always whispered. Please don't.

I can't, you always said. I'm sorry.

A week passed. You stayed shut in your room, unable to even get out of bed. It snapped at your heels every minute, and you couldn't figure out for the life of you how to make it stop.

Frost dragged you out after that week. He told you what you'd missed, and, with an unreadable expression on his face, that the Joker was proud of you.

"At least someone is," you said.

Frost shook his head, looking angry. "Don't. What he did was wrong, and even if it wasn't, he definitely shouldn't have done that so soon. He usually doesn't."

"Since when did you stop expecting the unexpected from him?" you asked.

"Since years of habit made me a little soft in that area," he said. "In any case- I'm sorry. I should have done something."

"What could you have done? He'd have hurt you if you got involved. I might not know everything about him, but I know enough. He would do it."

He shrugged. "I know. But maybe I could have talked him down, you know? It's happened before."

"Now that I'd like to see," you said, trying to smirk. It fell rather flat- Frost was too busy stewing in his guilt to catch it. You sighed. "Look, Frost, it's okay. Just... give me a few days, if you can."

"As long as you need," he promised. "It's the least I can do."

You smiled. "Thank you."

But you didn't get more than two days after that, because Joker sent Foxy to come get you and bring you up to his penthouse floor. Foxy patted your shoulder as he left, his expression a silent good luck.

When you entered his penthouse, he was once again nowhere to be seen. The silence was eerie as you moved through the living room, peering around corners and thinking about maybe pulling your gun. Was this some sort of test?

You walked slowly down the hallway, having decided to pull your gun a few feet back. You couldn't help but notice how elegant the place was- all marble floors and gilded gold decoration.

When you got to the back of the hallway, you smelled the familiar scent of cigarette smoke. It was coming from the bedroom at the end of the hallway.

You peeked inside, all of your instincts on high alert. There was Joker, all pale skin and dark black ink. He was sprawled out on the bed, wearing nothing but black jeans. In between his long, elegant fingers was a lit cigarette, as you'd suspected.

"Y/N!" He called, leaping off the bed in one smooth motion. His metal smile was wide as he watched you slip your gun back into your waistband.

What could he want with you?

—-

sorry this is late, y'all ;-; my motivation has gone down the fucking tubes lately (plus schoolwork which has been kicking my ass pre-winter break) but! i'm going to be writing more for this story really soon. also, merry belated christmas if you celebrate it! and happy hanukkah. and any other winter holiday i might not know about. love y'all <3