She wiped the blade that she got from her mother's makeup sharpener then washed her running eyeliner off. She sneaked out from the bathroom, into her room, hiding the blade back under her bookshelf. Getting into her bed, she looked down at her wrists she thought, "Why did I just do this. Does this really help? My parents still don't care, I still have bad grades, Kendall is still living happily without me." A tear fell from her eye as she thought about Kendall, "Why can't I be happy without him? Come on, Kelsey. Let him go." She looked up at her ceiling, "If you really are up there, please, let me wake up with you." She wiped her cheeks, closed her eyes, and slept.
"Kelsey, it's 7:00. Get up." her mom, Ann, shook her awake. "Woo, another day of hopeless trying." Kelsey stretched. Ann, her mom, turned around, "What do you mean?" Kelsey looked at her surprised she even cared to ask. "Um, I mean I try so hard on every assignment, but my teachers just give me a grade lower than a B. I try so hard to be nice and give compliments, yet people walk past me as I sit alone at lunch." Ann walked out of her room, "Just focus on learning." Kelsey shook her head, "Again, she doesn't understand that I can't focus while feeling like someone is constantly looking at how lonely I am. Like I'm a loner, a loser. It's second semester in my freshman year. If someone were to come up to me it would be out of sorrow, to even just asking for a pencil."
Sitting in her math class, being the first done with the assignment, Kelsey slipped out her phone. "I wonder how Bea is right now." She thought, bringing up their text messages.
Bea hears her phone vibrate from her backpack, "That must be Kelsey." she thought to herself. She reaches into her backpack and feels around for her cell. The zipper of her backpack causes her sleeve to roll up, revealing the destruction from the night before. Bea, of course, doesn't notice this and just pulls out her phone and checks her texts. "Hey." the text read. She replies, slips her phone back into her bag, and tries to catch up with the notes she missed on the board. Her forearm was still visible, showing her scars.
During class, Bea looked over to her hopeless crush, Michael, to see he already had his eyes stuck on something on her desk. Bea looks down, targeting to her arm on her desk. Her arm, revealing her cuts. She quickly asks to go to the restroom. Once she got there, she looked at herself in the mirror. She noticed her own dead eyes, her droopy eyelids, her smeared eyeliner from the night before. She looked at herself with peculiar looks. She would think, "Why do you even keep trying? Why bother putting on makeup when you know that there's no one to impress?" She splashed her face with water and washed her hands. Bea's eyes started to water as memories from the night before floated into her mind.
She shook the thought out of her mind and rushed back to her classroom. Rubbing her eyes, she hoped that Jean, her enemy and big reason for her insecurities, wasn't at school today. She just wasn't in the mood for more crying. In fact, she wasn't even sure she had enough tears left. Once she got back to her classroom, she slowly walked back to her desk and sat down. Bea took one quick glance at Michael and the bell rang for her next period.
YOU ARE READING
Realizing
Short Story"It usually starts in your teens. It's where you feel sad, you feel like you have nothing; like you're worth nothing, you feel alone. You try to tell yourself that you're not alone but you can't find anyone who understands. Depression. It kills. But...
