Growing up Kelsey never really questioned her sexuality. She once thought about if she liked girls but she knew she doesn't get attracted to them at all. Kelsey never thought about if there were more sexualities than lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transexual. Though a couple of the people she met in her first year of high school helped her learn that there was many more. Like pansexual, demisexual, aromantic, asexual, and many more.
Kelsey learned about most of these sexualities, and noticed that she may fit to be asexual. Asexual: without sex or sexuality. While most people in her high school would be looking for someone to get in bed with, Kelsey usually only thought about cuddling and kissing with a boyfriend she may get. She doesn't think doing sexual activities is important, especially before wanting a baby.
She did more research on asexuality to get more familiar with it and to see if she really was asexual. Kelsey learned that some asexuals still can get horny, and some asexuals still going through puberty can grow out of it. She learned that some asexuals still want to have a family, and that being asexual doesn't mean you don't want a relationship. Kelsey decided she was hetero-asexual.
Unlike Kelsey, Bea always questioned her sexuality. She thought about if she liked girls, but she always told herself that she was straight, at the risk of being judged. She thought she might of been bisexual, or attracted to both men and women, but she didn't want to jump to conclusions.
Through all this, she just wanted to love whoever she wanted without being judged. People already called her lesbian at school, so it was hard for her to be "out" about her confusion in sexuality. Finally, in grade 7, she realized that she was pansexual. Pansexuality, or omnisexuality is the sexual attraction, romantic love, or emotional attraction toward people of any sex or gender identity.
When she found out about pansexuality, she didn't feel as trapped and confused as she did when she wasn't sure. She told her friends and was happy and excited by the fact that she wasn't judged by them. She loved showing pride towards her sexuality, and being in a community of others who have gone through the same as her during their confusion. Bea was in a state of temporary happiness.
Kelsey liked finding people who were apart of the lgbt community. She liked to learn about their sexualities and how they live with them. She knew about all the hate they may get, knowing that her parents, and many other parents, didn't really agree with being something other than straight. She knew this about her parents because her dad would always make comments or give bad looks when he saw a gay, and her mom is one of the people who would say "That outfit makes you look lesbian." like being lesbian was a bad thing. Hearing this from her mom, she would of course reply, "What's bad about being lesbian?" and of course her mom would reply back, "If you're gay, Kelsey, just admit it." which would of course get Kelsey to reply, "Oh, if I was I would be proud of it and take pride in myself."
Her mom and she would constantly have this conversation. Especially the day Kelsey went to the pride parade that her friend invited her too. Kelsey obviously wanted to go because she loves to support lgbt+ but she knew that her mom would think of her as a lesbian even more. Having her mom think she was lesbian only bothered Kelsey because she knew her parents would just look at her differently if she was one. Kelsey wondered why being a different sexuality than straight even bother homophobic people. She honestly couldn't think of a reason why it was wrong unless someone grew up with those Christian parents that think lgbt+ is wrong. Which also shouldn't be an excuse because Christians always mention how "God loves all people." then they may add "but gays or people who don't believe in him." Though they are people too.
Bea also never understood what was so wrong with falling in love with someone of the same sex. Homophobes would say that "homosexuality is wrong" and "gay people are going to hell", but why? Bea wished she could ask every homophobe on Earth, "Why? What's wrong with falling in love?" When same-sex marriage became legal in all 50 US states, Bea started tearing up. She had always thought, "What if I marry someone who isn't.. male?" Her and her fellow lgbt+ members finally had rights.
Also, Bea always wanted to spread her words around the world to children going through the same as she did. She wanted to tell them that being confused is okay. Everyone goes through a time in their life where they're confused about everything going on around them. Their bodies changing, sexuality, bullying.. It happens to all of us. Bea needed to just tell them to be proud of their sexuality, and don't let anyone take away their pride.
YOU ARE READING
Realizing
Kurzgeschichten"It usually starts in your teens. It's where you feel sad, you feel like you have nothing; like you're worth nothing, you feel alone. You try to tell yourself that you're not alone but you can't find anyone who understands. Depression. It kills. But...
