Buddies and Bullies-5sos

"Killer"

Luke's POV
-This chapter is just feelings.
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The fact that I couldn't get her out of my fucking mind was impossible. I felt like bashing my skull across the wall, and it still wouldn't hurt as much. I killed me to know that she's in a happy place forgetting me. I deserve it. I forgot about her. Why was it so stupid of me to get caught up in this little love thing and the price to get out was heartbreaks. I just can't handle having someone that I love so much and yet to know that each time I make a risky mistake I could lose them in a second.

Both of them changed me into different ways. I love both of them. Why can't one of them feel the same way about me? This girl I fell head over heels, she was so like me. Everything we had, we shared. It's like we were reading each other's minds, we knew every detail. But this other girl. I used to think she was a little bitch. Punching her and bullying her without realizing that every time she goes through things like this she still has the tiny little bit of courage enough to fake a smile and tell everyone she's okay. I could never do that. We were so different. She liked the cold and I felt the sun was the best feeling when you feel the blast of heat at your shoulder, she liked the frost of the wind chilling up her spine. We knew nothing about each other. But she changed me without no doubt. I trust her. And mostly I love her. I love them both. But which one more.

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Kaitlyn.

I loved her more then anything. The feeling of her slipping away from my fingers made my stomach deepen, my lungs constantly being choked. Every Time I let the words slip under my tongue. I wanted her back I wanted to wake up next to her and still hear her voice complain about how she won't kiss me because of her morning breath. I wanted her scared in movies so she can lean in and feel protected under me. I wanted her sweet lips curl into mine.

But I couldn't get her back.

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Cara.

I don't even know how to explain her. I loved her, and I knew deep inside she would fall for me soon enough. This girl saved me from anything that was taunting me, bothering me, haunting me. She gave me hope that I could find someone new, and love them more as I can every time. I can't lose her.

She'll never be mine. She'll never be my prom date. She'll never be my everything. But I want to remember her as the regret that I shouldn't have put too much milk in my coffee because every time I look into is it reminds me of Cara's thick brown eyes.