Penny Boards and Walker Guts

3. Don't Tell Anyone

"Lexi I'm so glad you're alive and well." Rick said as we pulled away from our hug. I was at the house him and his group were staying in. They all wanted to stay together which was smart.

"I'm glad your okay too. Carl told me about Lori. I'm so sorry Rick. She was an amazing woman and she loved you." I hesitated talking about Lori. I know I sound like a grown up but with what I've seen and being outside in the real world you don't have time to be a kid.

"Thank you. Come meet our group." Rick said leading me into the living room. Sleeping bags were laid on the floor. Pillows, blankets, cushions, backpacks and other things laid here and there with people scattered everyone.

"Guys! This is Lexi. She was Carls friend before all of this. She's a good kid." Rick said gaining everyone attention. I scrunched up my nose when he called me a kid and I looked up at him.

"I'm not a kid Rick. Not anymore." I said softly and he nodded at me giving me a sad smile.

"Lexi this is Daryl, Sasha, Michonne, Tara, Eugene, Abraham, Rosita, Carol, Maggie, Glenn, Gabriel and little Judith." I looked at the playful baby girl that the Maggie was holding.

"Rick, shes beautiful. She has her eyes." I said my eyes stinging as a wave of sadness flooded through me.

"Yeah." Rick said shuffling his feet and looking down. He knew who I was talking about when I said 'her'.

"Can I hold her?" I asked softly looking at Maggie and back at Rick.

"Of course." I slowly walked to Maggie and she handed me the tiny infant.

I cuddled the baby who squirmed in my arms before finally she settled down. She looked into my eyes and I saw a flash of Lori in my mind.

~ Flash Back ~

"Kids?" I heard Lori's voice call from downstairs.

"Yeah mom?" Carl called back groggily and he rubbed his eyes.

"I made pancakes!" She called back sounding excited. I giggled as Carl groaned.

"Great." Carl said sarcastically. We both giggled and walked downstairs.

We sat down at the table as Lori placed plates in front of us with two small pancakes.

"What would you guys like to drink?" She asked smiling widely. Her eyes sparkled and I saw a mother figure. She was my second mother.

~ End of Flashback ~

I only just noticed I was crying when I felt a tiny and soft hand on my cheek. I looked down at the beautiful baby girl in my arms. I kissed her forehead before giving her back to Maggie.

"Sorry." I sighed wiping my face.

Everyone gave me sad looks except for one man in the corner of the room. He was a redneck that was for sure.

"What's your guys plan?" I asked seriously.

"Stay here I guess." Rick said avoiding eye contact with me.

"Rick," I pulled Ruck away from the group. "you need to know something. The people here are good people. I know you're not the man you use to be. I can see it in your eyes. You will protect them no matter what and I understand that but there are kids and elders here. Some people can't survive out there. There's also people who are clueless and don't know what it's like. I've been thinking about this the 4 months I've been here. I hope you'll let me be part of your group." I studied Rick's hard expression. "Think about it." I turned around and head for the front door but not before sticking my head into the living room. "It was nice to meet you all. See you around." I got a couple of 'good-byes' and such before I exited the house.

I ran a hand through my hair sighing and walking down the street.

I need a drink. I thought to myself. I walked into my house closing and locking the door. I stomped into the kitchen and opened the cupboard under the sink. I moved some random bottles and found the secret bottle of alcohol I had. Bourbon.

"What are you doing?" A voice said to my far left. My head snapped up and I stared at Carl.

"Why the fuck are you in my house?" I snapped avoiding his question.

"I was waiting for you. Why do you have a bottle of bourbon?" Carl asked staring at the bottle. I put the bottle back under the sink and walked over to him. "You need to leave Carl." I said sounding harsher than I meant to. I put a hand on his shoulder and tried unsuccessfully to push him towards the front door.

"No! Not until you tell me why you started drinking!" Carl insisted shrugging my hand off and walking to the living room.

"Carl, I don't wanna talk about it. I'm serious. Leave!" I said looking down. I sounded weak. I was to tired to fight with him.

Suddenly I was shoved against the wall and Carl's blue eyes were staring angrily at me.

"Why?!" He growled out through gritted teeth.

"IT TAKES THE PAIN AWAY CARL!" I screamed in his face. I kicked my leg up which made the pressure on my wrists go away. Carl bent down groaning. I kicked his side making him fall over. "Don't tell anyone!" I said before I ran to the front door grabbing my penny board that I had next to the door and running out of the house.

I road my board over to Enid's house as tears rolled down my face. I kept wiping my eyes trying to keep my vision from blurring.

I banged on Enid's door. She also lived alone so I didn't have to worry about her parents or anything. The door opened and I stormed inside past Mikey.

"Lexi?" I heard him call to me and I heard the front door close.

I stormed to the living room dropping my board carelessly on the floor. I grabbed Enid's wrist and dragged her upstairs into her room and I closed the door.

"Lexi?" She softly spoke my name as I turned away from her and placed my hands on top of my head.

I screamed loudly and punched her wall causing my fist to straight through. I groaned and looked at my bleeding knuckles. I sank to the floor and Enid was beside me in seconds with an arm around me. I cried into her shoulder until I cried myself to sleep.