Meanwhile, in a place called America, an Eaglelandian province...
18-year-old Ninten, his 18-year-old girlfriend, Ana, and his 17-year-old best friend, Lloyd met up in the big town of Merrysville.
"Ninten, why did you call us here?" Ana asked, crossing her arms.
"My little cousin from Onett needed my help," Ninten explained simply, "And I figured, it would be fun to bring you guys along."
"That's a p-pretty good idea!" blubbered Lloyd, still a bit insecure.
"But... why not bring Teddy?" Ana questioned further.
"First off, he's, like... what? 27? And also, he doesn't know or care about my cousin," he bluntly justified, "I thought of you two as suitable comrades that I can bring with me... if that's okay with you, of course."
"Aw, that's awfully nice of ya, Ninty!" Lloyd smiled sincerely.
"Well, what's in it for me... I mean, us, my Ninten?" Ana cheekily smirked to the point that it was almost irritating.
"Okay, it's gotten to this point, eh? Alright, lemme remember. Oh, YEAH! They've got killer ice cream bars, better than the ones here!"
"Alright, I'm in," Ana fanatically waved her arms in the air.
"You mean 'choc ices'? My Winterrian doctor said I can't have those because I'm sensitive to cold foods," Lloyd twiddled his thumbs in disappointment.
"Oh, um..." Ninten pondered for a moment to think of something Lloyd could have without dying, "How about some pretty nice steak? I'm more of a prime ribs guy myself, but..."
"Alright! I'm happy with that!" Lloyd immediately agreed, patting his stomach in utter euphoria and imagining a big, hearty steak right in front of him.
"So, er... Ninten!"
"Hm, Ana?"
"How will we get to... Onett, I believe you said? Yes, how will we get there?"
"Isn't it obvious? It begins with a T and ends with a T."
Ana thought for a moment, but then got red in the face, looking flustered. She then quickly covered her chest area.
"U-um... p-please... enlighten me on how... those are transportation methods... Um, actually, nevermind, don't!"
"No, silly!" Ninten straight-up GUFFAWED, "It's Teleport! Teleportation! I can't believe you'd think that! I won't do it until we're married, heh."
Ana got more flustered and somehow discovered a new shade of red on her face in the process.
"C-c-c-can you even say that????"
"Ah, I'm just jokin'. You don't have to do it if you don't wanna," Ninten smiled reassuringly, "I wanna protect you."
This comforted Ana.
"I love you, Ninten!" Ana beamed, as her hat was about to fall off.
"I love you too, Ana..." Ninten weakly smiled, adjusting her hat.
They then made out for, like, 20 seconds.
Lonely Lloyd just sat there, internally crying.
"Uh...er... not to be rude, but... we should probably g-get going..."
"Oh... um... you were... watching..." Ana covered her face, where she beat her own record with getting red-in-the-face.
"L-let's go, everyone!" blurted Ninten, hiding his face in his cap, "PK Teleport Beta!"
They spun in circles until Lloyd just had to say...
"CoUlDn'T yOu JuSt'Ve DoNe 4th-D-sLiP?!?!"
"It DoEsN't WoRk LiKe ThAaAaAaAaAt!!!"
This time, Ana's hat definitely fell off.
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Ness, Jeff and Tony sat on his bedroom floor. The tension was very palpable. So palpable that you could cut it with a knife and make hot dogs out of them.
"Ness. When the... HELL is your cousin arriving?" Tony inquired, trying to sound aggressive.
"Right about-"
The doorbell rang.
"Now..."
A/N: I told you I wouldn't keep my promise!
Happy Boxing Day, Happy Kwaanza, happy day!
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ETTSON: Rewritten
FanfictionA remake of ETTSON Ettson is a story that takes place 2 years after the events of EarthBound (or Mother 2, if you're from Japan). I made this story in February 2020, but deleted in January of the following year. I'm here to remake it. Language ＆...
