Leah Grimes

Chapter 101

We followed the path and I gasped when I saw Siddiq hurt and leaning up on a tree. "What happened?" Michonne asked. I leaned forward trying to see if anyone else was around. Siddiq pointed his finger up a hill and we all slowly walked up it.

My knees felt weak when I saw the first head. There were sticks stabbed into the ground and on top of each one had a head. Tara, Enid, and Henry, there were others, but these were the faces I recognized first. They were dead. There was nothing left of them but their heads. "No," I whispered. I felt my knees finally give out and Michonne fell to the ground with me holding me tightly in her arms as I stared up at their ghostly faces.

Enid was gone, Henry was gone. My two best friends. I let out another small whisper, begging whatever god there was to let this be a nightmare.

My body had given up all hope. I felt Daryl grab my arm helping me stand up. I barely remember the walk back home, I don't remember how I got back the Kingdom. I was sitting here in front of Siddiq listening to him explain to everyone what had happened. When his speech was done I still felt numb, and lost.

I lifted my head when I saw Lydia standing in front of me. "Can you take me?" I slowly shook my head confused, "take you where?" She bit her lip, "to where it happened." Daryl came up behind her, "why?" She shrugged, "I want to say goodbye, say thank you." I closed my eyes for a moment, "I'll take you." Daryl nodded, "I'm coming with you."

I grabbed my coat doing my best to avoid everyone here, meeting them at the gates. "I'm sorry," Lydia whispered to me. I met her eyes, "you didn't kill them. I know that."

When we got to the hill we let Lydia go to Henry's post and I turned away looking at the trees instead. "We can go now." Daryl whispered. I bit my lip trying to hide my cloudy eyes, "why Enid, and all those other people. They had nothing to do with this." Daryl shook his head, "this ain't your fault, or her fault or anyone's besides Alphas." I sighed, "it's just we're the ones who helped Lydia." He nodded, "I know."

Lydia turned to look at us, and quietly the three of us turned and walked back to the kingdom. Michonne met me at the gate, giving me a small smile. "Let's go home Leah." I turned to Daryl, "please come with us." He shook his head, "I can't, not right now." I closed my eyes as he wrapped his arms around me, "take care of yourself Leah. I'll see you soon." I stepped into the carriage feeling Judith curl into my arm, and let myself lean onto Michonne closing my eyes to block the tears from falling.

"We're coming back soon. They'll need help escorting groups of people back to Hilltop. It won't be too long." I nodded, thinking about Henry. How he thanked me for helping him, always being there since Benjamin died, and when he actually needed me I wasn't there for him.

When we got to Alexandria I went to my room immediately sliding down the wall and letting out muffled sobs. I was still shaking at what had happened to them, we were all there together at the fair and then they were dead.

————

Michonne was right it was only a few months later when they needed help. The ride there was quiet, cold and gloomy. And seeing everyone again felt the exact same. Carol and I only managed to exchange small smiles, Lydia gave me a nod, and Daryl gave me a small hug, as usual.

We took off almost immediately, I walked beside Daryl, directly behind the horses for a long portion of the walk. It was only getting colder as it got darker and eventually we had to make the emergency plan to stay at the sanctuary over night.

When it came into sight I almost stopped walking. It had been years since I actually had been here. I almost laughed when I remembered Carl's big plan to kill Negan. I remember being scared to death in the back of the delivery truck and Carl handing me his machine gun, shooting right away.

As they tried to get the fire started I found a spot on the stairs far away from everyone pulling the blankets closer to myself. I looked up as I felt someone sit down beside me. "How did you do it?" Carol whispered. I bit my lip, "do what?" She sighed, "cope, after Benjamin died, Carl and your father?" I met her eyes, "I didn't, I still miss them more than anything." We both turned as Daryl sat down behind us.

"I just feel like I'm losing myself again." Carol whispered. I squeezed her hand, "when that boy hurt me, I woke up feeling numb for years. That ultimately destroyed a large part of me. I felt like I'd never feel or be the same, I didn't even feel comfortable in my own skin. And that added on with all of them dying it literally made me feel like a dead person walking. I felt like nothing. I know how you feel Carol, and I know it's gonna take a long time to ever feel even remotely close to the person you were before losing Henry, I feel like I've been thrown back to square one losing so many people at once again." Daryl nodded, "if you want me to run away with the girl I can, I'll protect her on my own." I shook my head, "you're not going alone." Carol sighed, "do you even want to leave?" Daryl played with his hands, "no." I put my arm around Carol, "I'm sorry." She put her head on my shoulder, "me too."