Dave's Red Eyes

Thongs and Flowers

[A/N: I got a few replies on the last chapter for breaking the fourth wall. Sorry, it won't happen again!]

Daves POV:

You sit at your hella awesome turn tables, wondering how many people right now are reading this thinking that you're in your white scratched record boxers with nothing else on. Well, a lot, now, probably. Nope, they're not right at all. You're in fact, not sitting half naked in boxers. It's a motherfucking thong, get it right, fangirls.

Jokes and fourth wall breaking aside, you are at your turn tables, but you're fully clothed and may or may not be wearing a bedazzled thong under your fucking awesome pants.

You wish that you knew what John was going through, but since your brother is already engaged to Jake, it was more of a "whatever" case with you. But until he gets the nerve to tell his dad, he and you both have managed to put his coming out to his father on the back-burner.

It was Easter, just the other day, and it's not like you celebrate this holiday for religious reasons or whatever, but you and Dirk both find it a good time to stock up on candy, and usually you buy each other something you'd think would be horrible or awkward to eat and give it to the other person. Well. it's less of giving than it is throwing at top speed towards the others face or their jewels. You're a Strider, everything you do has to be more complex and badass than the next guy.

It's after school so you're ignoring your homework by getting up to grab a bag of Doritos, and you're just casually walking by, minding your own business when you suddenly see some kind of strange, unexpected image on your bro's laptop. One might think that at these words, it would be Jake in a bikini. But that's something that you would definitely expect. But no, Dirk, sitting at his laptop, is on the internet looking at flowers. Flowers.

"Uh, Dirk?" You question as you stand over his shoulder.

His head turns back to look at you, his sunglasses tucked into his shirt, letting his orange eyes be visible to you. "Yeah?" He said casually, as if it were a time when you needed something from him.

"Whatcha looking at, buddy?" You try to make it sound as if you're talking to someone who's doing something insane, or like an insane person about to flip on someone who messed up.

Dirk looked back at his screen, then back at you. "Flowers."

You shifted a little, so you could be more comfortable. "Why the hell would you be looking at flowers?"

Dirk turned back to his laptop for real this time. "Roxy said I should get some for the wedding, so I figured this would be an easier task than some of the other shit for a while."

"Okay, then." You reply, but as soon as you start to walk away, Dirk catches you by the arm. "What?"

"You haven't gone out on a date yet."

"Dirk, you know I fucking would if I fucking could!" You moan, trying to yank your arm free with success. "John's dad doesn't know about anything. And he can't know." You add.

Putting his hands behind his head, like Sora from Kingdom Hearts tends to do, he used his limbs as a pillow. "So? Just invite John here, and we can clean him up for your date."

Okay. There apparently was a much easier solution that you and John never thought about. You try to think for any reason, any reason at all why this could be a bad idea. But can one come to your mind? Apparently not.

"Maybe..." You reply, acting as if you'll give it more thought, when, in fact, you have decided to go ahead and see if Friday or Saturday would work for your little boy in blue.