NCT Oneshots {ot23} | open

Sinking: Yuta + Renjun {Request}

▹request acc: SkiidaSpeeder
▹prompt: Yuta fell in love with Johnny, but Johnny is in a relationship with Mark so he finds comfort in eating and develops and eating disorder. Renjun helps him out
▹word count: 5135
▹warnings: binging and purging, heavy ed theme

ˑ༄ؘ ۪۪۫۫ ▹❀◃ ۪۪۫۫ ༄ؘ ˑ

Yuta stirs awake to the sound of Mark's laughter. The addictive, contagious, shrieking of Mark's laughter that has everyone fawning over the boy, teasing him, laughing alongside him. But this morning, Yuta rolls over and pulls his duvet over his head, willing sleep to take over the fogginess of his head once again.

Johnny's voice can be heard a few moments later. It's muffled by the walls, but Yuta can still hear the smoothness of each syllable despite not understanding every word in English that the couple say, and he squeezes his eyes shut tighter.

Yuta's skin is a little sticky from sleeping with his duvet in the warm weather. His ac whirs in the corner of the room. Despite the excruciating heat that has him dizzy, he shivers. Or maybe it's Johnny's voice that has him dizzy.

It's probably that, he groans as he sits up to run his fingers through his knotted hair and rub the remainder of sleep from his eyes. Ever since he met Johnny as a trainee, the man has him going crazy. The long hours together in the practice room have always been agonising, and Yuta has to will his eyes to not stick to Johnny, or to at least not be too obvious about it, and ever since Mark and Johnny declared their relationship, Yuta has been clinging onto sanity by a very thin thread.

Knowing that the man he's fallen in love with is now dating one of his closest friends is the worst kind of agony.

The agony that has his stomach twisting into knots and his hands curling into fists, yet all he can do is smile at the camera and baby Mark like he always has done. He absolutely cannot afford for the fans to catch onto him and his messy feelings.

There's a knock at the door that pounds his head, and he grumbles out that he's getting dressed when he in fact stays laying down, eyes fixed on the ceiling.

They have practice today. All day. Ten hours in the practice room with a sweating, handsome Johnny and a focussed Mark that he can't even find adorable anymore because Johnny has claimed all the rights to smother him with love.

As he pulls the first t-shirt he finds over his head, Yuta mourns the days where him and Johnny were close. Close enough for him to pretend that their midnight walks were dates.

"I'm coming!" Yuta snaps with more vigour than intended when the person knocks again, and he swings open the door to meet a stunned Taeil. "Sorry. Morning, hyung." Yuta greets, hands reaching his hair again.

"Is everything alright? Do you need the day off? I can speak to our manager." Taeyong appears in the hallway with a stack of Tupperware, no doubt containing their lunch and dinner, and scans Yuta's dishevelled appearance up and down. They may only have dance practice, but that doesn't mean Yuta wouldn't usually make a fashion statement, so his stained t-shirt and unwashed sweatpants must look out of place on his body.

"I'm fine, Taeyong." Yuta huffs. He clearly isn't. But how is he supposed to explain to the leader that he's in love with Johnny and is currently trying his best to not hate Mark?

He can't. So, he shuffles past the two other members and reaches the kitchen, only to shut his eyes again and sink into the seat at the furthest end of the table.

Mark is still giggling over a joke Johnny made, head resting on his boyfriend's bare shoulder. Bare shoulder, because Johnny is sat shirtless. Abs and tattoos on display, although his muscular body contrasts with the crinkle of his eyes as he laughs along with his boyfriend, the two sides to the man clashing in a way that has Yuta's mouth turning dry. Yuta reaches for some food even though he's not hungry.