Youtube One-Shots

Tired (Phan)

Hi everyone! I think i already established this, but basically I'm only going to be writing phan on here. Sorry if you don't ship them but I'm comfortable writing about them so yup.

Genre: Angst (sorry), and a tiny bit of fluff

Warnings: Depression, suicidal thoughts, eating disorder, and thoughts of self harm, and suicide. *major character death*

Word Count: 3,063

*PLEASE DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU MIGHT BE TRIGGERED*

Phil POV:

I've been with Dan for a while now, and I love him. He's an amazing person and I can say that I haven't been this happy in a long time. However, something hasn't been right with him lately. He seems distant, and more sad. He locks himself in his room for hours on end and he won't let me in. I've tried everything, but he still won't open up to me and talk. He barely eats and God only knows what's happening in his room. I want him to be happier, and I have tried so hard to make him happy, but I just can't. I've tried talking to him, getting him to eat, and everything in between, but I can't seem to help him. I'm worried. Sometimes I hear him crying late at night. I knock on his door, but he pretends to be okay.

I knocked on his door now, desperately trying to get him to at least watch a movie with me. Finally he opened it, but he looked angry. His eyebrows were scrunched together and his fists were clenched.

"What, Phil? I'm fine, okay?" He yelled, obviously annoyed at me. I backed away, taken aback by his harsh tone of voice.

"I, um, was just wondering if you wanted to watch a movie?" The simple statement turned out more as a question now that I was more scared. Dan ran his fingers through his hair and sighed, looking down at the floor. He shook his head, much to my despair.

"No thanks." He said, turning around to go back into his room. I was mad now. I grabbed his wrist and shook my head. I didn't want to scare him, but I was fed up with this and I wanted to actually see him again.

"Phil, what the hell? Get off! I don't want to watch a fucking movie!" He said, smacking my hand and trying to trap himself in his room. I didn't mean for him to get scared. I really didn't, I was just tired of him being distant.

"No, Dan. You can't keep being so distant. It scares me, okay? I want to help, but you keep pushing me away and I'm tired of it." I said, sitting him on the couch.

"I'm fine." He said, crossing his arms and glaring at me. He turned his head to the wall to avoid my gaze.

"You're lying to me." I said, tears taking place in my eyes. He looked up at me from on the couch and shook his head the slightest bit. I could see tears beginning to make his eyes glassy as well.

"You said you'd never lie to me. You're lying to me now. You promised me!" I said, my lip quivering and tears spilling down my cheeks leaving behind wet trails. Dan looked away in shame and I could see tears begin to fall at the mention of our glory days. I really miss those days. Before I could think, Dan ran to his room. I ran after him, but the time I got to his room he was already locked in. I didn't know what he was capable of.

"Dan, please open the door." I whispered, "I'm sorry I was so harsh, just please come back out." I said. I was still crying, little sobs coming from my mouth every so often. I was scared. Suddenly, I heard soft whimpers, followed by a loud thump.

Dan POV: (When Phil came to get him before the fight)

I was sure that Phil knew. About everything. The cutting, not eating. All of it. I barely talked to him. I missed him. I wish he wasn't suspicious. I wish everything was back to normal. And, to be honest, i wish I was happy again. I missed what I used to be.