Never Letting Go [A Marauder's Story]

The Very First and Last Night

Grant sat up abruptly when he heard the door open, smiling when he saw the four marauders. His smile faltered slightly though when he saw the thunderous look on Remus' face.

"HE MUST BE FUCKING JOKING!" Remus exclaimed before remembering that Grant was there, which added a brand new layer of worry.

"Nice to see you too" Grant teased hoping to get a smile out of his friend.

"Not now" Remus snapped before going to shut himself into his bed, pulling the curtains around him.

"Come on, I'll catch you up" James said patting Grant on the shoulder and bringing him over to his bed and casting a silencing charm, knowing that if Remus heard him he'd practically throttle him. 

Sirius just glanced over at Remus' bed and sighed. He wanted to go in there and hold him and tell him they'll be okay but he knew he couldn't, not when Remus was this upset. He needed to be alone.

Sirius saw how dark it was outside and saw the curtains drawn on Jame's bed as he talked to Grant. He figured he might swell get some sleep. The lack of food and all of the stress was starting to make him feel quite nauseous. Sirius wasn't that surprised that as soon as his head hit the pillow he blacked out into a deep sleep.

...........................................

Sirius was tapped awake and almost jumped when he came to his senses. There was Remus, beautiful, tall Remus, looking at him.

"Remus...what..."

"I can't do this Sirius" he said, his voice broken and quiet.

This made Sirius sit up fast, knowing that Remus only became this vulnerable if something was really bothering him.

"You're Remus Lupin, which means you can do anything" Sirius said, looking up at his friend.

"But not this" Remus whispered, trying not to wake up the other 3 boys. This brought to mind Grant and then he looked at Sirius curiously. "Where's James,. wasn't he bunking with you tonight whilst Grant took his bed?"

Sirius looked over at Jame's bed that still had the curtains closed. 

"Maybe James is bunking with Grant. By the looks of it they're basically best friends" Sirius said his reassuring tone now changing to spitting with jealousy.

Remus just shook his head and Sirius noticed before pushing Grant out of his mind.

"Wanna join me?" Sirius asked softly as he budged up, patting the mattress space next to him.

"You know I'm still mad at you but...right now with everything i..." Remus sighed before giving in and laying on the mattress pulling Sirius' covers over himself. Feeling the warmth of Sirius next to him was so familiar and safe that he seemed to relax immediately.

Sirius quietly casted a silencing charm so they could talk openly and then turned to look at Remus, who's face was only inches away.

"We'll all be with you" Sirius said softly "even though we'll have to miss this year at Hogwarts...I'd rather you were safe" he said honestly.

"It won't ever be safe. not for any of us" Remus said under his breath before turning to look at Sirius "I'll feel like I'm abandoning the school. The people here...Lily...Marlene and Mary I..."

"They'll be so focused on exams and joining the Order that they won't be mad. Besides it's likely that the students will be sent home after the information that Dumbledore's go ahold of"