Complications

Chapter 25:

Come on. Don't be a coward. It's not like anything bad is gonna happen. You didn't make yourself go into an eleven coma. They will be happy I'm back. Right? Fuck they are gonna hate me. They don't wanna see me they probably have a replacement mother already. I've emotionally stunted my kids and it's my fucking fault.
"Derek, I I can't. I can't do this. Maybe I can do it tomorrow. I can't. They, they. I can't." She spit out, her hands trembling and knees locking. Derek grasped her pale face in his hands, "Meredith. You're right we don't know what going to happen. We don't and I'm sorry I don't have comforting words but we don't know. But you and the kids deserve for you to at least try. All we can do is hope for the best." Her body shook furiously but she nodded nevertheless leaning forward their foreheads touching, and they reveled in each others warmth. Their love for each other acting as a blockade of their fears.

Anxiety surged through her body as she went down the staircase, her knuckles white from her tight hold on the rails. "Relax baby." he whispered behind her, his arms around her keeping her upright. The mouth full of air rushed out past her lips and she gave a rocky smile. "Kids... I want you guys to come here please." His paternal voice seeped through his words and she smiled helplessly hearing him try to seem tough and stern but even as he meant the words to come out as a command they came out full of love and it almost brought years to her eyes. Hearing the little pitter patter of feet made her nails sink into the arms around her waist.

"Callie... come here and meet your mommy" Derek said clearly and made sure to be straight in front of Callie's line of vision. The girl's little blue eyes widened and she gleefully launched her body to Meredith's. Her cherub arms wrapped tightly around her neck and Meredith sobs loudly, her body shaking as Meredith placed millions of kisses to Callie's temple. " Mah-me" came her sweet unique voice.

What? Why... Why is she talking like that? Is she... What? Meredith's arms became flaccid, "Derek?" Her voice alarmed and frightened. Did I do this to her? Her subconscious tormented her with the thought of her causing her baby any harm. "Did I do this? Is... Is it my fault?" She sobbed, tightening her arms around her daughters slim body, instinctively trying to protect her from anything. But I'm too late. Derek gave her a sad smile and shook his head, silently telling her as best he could that the only thing Meredith had done was keep her daughter safe for nine months. He mouthed 'later' and watched Mark bite his lip as his eyes glazed with tears and pain. "M-Mom?" His voice cracked and he stood there, fidgeting with his hands shifting his weight from one foot to another. "Come here baby. I'm sorry" she opened her arm so he could join the hug and he quickly ran to her and nestled his face in her neck inhaling her sweet lavender scent. She looked up at Lexie who tried to hold her tears back but they streamed down her cheeks.

Meredith tried to get her to come as join in but Lexie sobbed and backed away shaking her head. " You left me. You left me all alone."

||I'm sorry it's really short.

~Valerie ||