Complications

Chapter21:

They are gonna hate you...

They are gonna hate you...

They are gonna hate you...

They are gonna hate you...

They are gonna hate you...

That's all she could think about during the second half of the trip back 'home'. sometimes she thinks if it would be better if she didn't recognize them. If she simply didn't care if they loved her or not, but then she would feel selfish because of the off chance they still love her. She would be selfish to Derek because he clearly has her up on a pedestal. She's so nervous, She doesn't want them to look at her like a stranger, She doesn't want to loose her only family.

"Derek?"

"Yea Mer" he replied while staring at the traffic ahead.

"Um... tell me about my kids? Please" she asked while fidgeting with the tips of her fingers.

A smile immediately broke free from his purses lips," what do you want to know?"

"Everything" the admiration on his face was crystal clear. it was like his blue eyes lit up like the sky on Fourth of July.

"Well Mark, he's captain of the soccer team at school. He plays goalie,and man he could block the fastest balls none get past him. college scouts are looking at him even though he is barely sixteen. um he isn't the smartest but has never brought home a C. his girlfriend broke up with him because he didn't give her sex, imagine that a sixteen year old hormone induced boy withholding sex from a girl. practically unheard of. The boy has will power the size of Texas." Meredith gave Derek a playful slap on his shoulder.

"Well I'm proud. he is waiting even though he is a guy, I think it's sweet."

"I think it has to do with you, I never brought home another women while you were in a coma. I think he wants that too."

"You should've."

"Should've what?"

"Slept with someone, someone else. Derek eleven years is a long time."

"Meredith" he sighed while running a hand through his peppered hair.

"I'm serious Derek."

"And Alex .... well she is not good. She doesn't go out, she is a bookworm. On her way of becoming valecdictorian. She gets bullied, a lot. she says it doesn't bother her but I know it does, she came home with a busted lip last week. She has no friends. Mer she cuts herself. I don't know what to do. and God she is gorgeous, smart, so

compassionate. I don't know why people would want to hurt her. she was so full of life and it was sucked out of her ever since...."

"Ever since I left her" she croaked out between her sobs.

"Meredith, you didn't leave her"

"Yes I did Derek. dont try to make me feel better! I left my family, what kind of mother does that !"

He took a deep sigh and changed the subject, not wanting to stress her out more than she was." She is amazing at volleyball and dancing. she has so many medals and trophies. she doesn't do it publicly but god she is amazing. I wish she'd just see it." Meredith couldn't help but sob hysterically. no matter what Derek said she felt at fault.

"What about Callie?"

His smile, if possibly grew exponentially," my little girl, our little girl she's amazing.... She is a daddy's girl, she is so out-going. The first to try and make friends. She is open minded, she doesn't judge other people. different people. And I put her in boxing because I don't want her to get hurt. not again...."