Red vs blue season 3 male oc

Calm Before The Storm

Fade in to Simmons talking to Sarge from the safe confines of the Warthog

Simmons: Okay, so let me get this straight... they were talking... to the bomb.

Grif: Dude, I don't know. They mentioned something about candles and a bubble bath, and they were playing some kind of a New Age CD. It's like a Yanni fan club meeting.

Alex: Grif That makes no sense.

Grif: Oh I know 

Sarge: That makes no sense at all. Did you wanna translate for us Pinky Pants?

Alex: I just said that Sarge.

Donut: My guess is that they're trying to get the bomb to do something for 'em.

Simmons: And all that sweet talk and candles will work on a bomb.

Alex: How do you know it won't upset it.

Donut: It would work on me!

Alex: Of course it would.

Donut: Well for your information it is very soothing thank you very much.

Sarge: Doncha see what they're tryin' to do?

Grif: No. Isn't that the point of this conversation?

Sarge: The Blues are obviously trying to coax the bomb into rearming. They're about to launch an attack. On us!

Alex: Tex built the bomb.

Simmons: So she probably has the button to arm the bomb.

Grif: I have to agree with Alex and Simmons why would they do that?

Sarge: Because they're Blues. Somebody get this kid the manual.

Simmons: Oh-ho, I hate the Blues.

Sarge: That's the spirit Simmons.

Alex: Simmons you are a major kiss-ass to Sarge who doesn't care for you.

Simmons: Y you don't know that r-right Sarge 

Sarge: Eh shut up Simmons.

Simmons: I am going to the Jeep to cheek it

Simmons runs of and in the distance crying can be heard Cut to several Lopezes in formation

O'Malley: Hoohoohoohohahaha. And now the hour is at hand. It is time, my robot minions.

Doc: He means robot miniones. Where's your cultural sensitivity?

O'Malley: Oh shut up. At last, we will seize our destiny!

Doc: Do we really have to seize destiny? Can't we just invite it to join our online circle of friends?

O'Malley: Quiet you fool. And quit sending me those invites. They're repulsive. Prepare for battle! We will break upon their fortress like an evil wind!

Doc: Oh.

O'Malley: Crushing our opponents with lightning speed! Attack!

Robot Army: Charge.

The Robot Army starts walking slowly forward

O'Malley: You there, hurry along. And you in the back. You- Lopez, can't you speed them up?

Lopez: [This is their maximum velocity.]

O'Malley: This isn't what I asked for.

Lopez: .[You said you wanted a day of victory. At this speed, they will win in exactly 24 hours.]