Stay, For Me

three

"So what did you want to talk to me about?"

Well here goes nothing, no turning back now. Everybody was right, she deserved to know. I needed to tell her and get it off my chest.

"After you left earlier," I said with a sigh, "something happened between me and Eddie. Something I don't think you're going to like."

"What happened Buck?" Taylor asked gently, "what's going on Buck?"

"Okay here goes nothing, Eddie and I got into a fight after you left, a pretty bad one. He told me and the team that he was leaving the 118 and I shut down before my emotions took over. I felt hurt, betrayed, and angry and I acted with those emotions. I deliberately provoked Eddie until he hit me and then I kept provoking him until he started beating the crap out of me. It doesn't make sense and it shouldn't have happened but it did. Bobby and Athena separated the two of us and Bobby took me over to some bench so we could talk. Athena did the same thing with Eddie. After we were both somewhat calm Eddie and I hugged it out. Although it didn't stop with a hug, I... ummm... I kissed Eddie and he almost instantly deepened the kiss. I kissed him because I'm in love with him Taylor, I always have been. I'm bisexual Taylor and I've been trying to deny who I really am and how I really feel for so long. I had a few relationships with guys in high school but I just chalked that up to experimenting with curiosity. Taylor I love you and you are such an amazing person, and I hope that you don't think less of me for this. I don't want to hurt you and I never intended to hurt you but, I can't deny that I'm in love with Eddie anymore. I have to be true to myself and embrace my sexuality. All the others saw it, and they all heard me tell Eddie that I loved him. Taylor please forgive me I didn't mean to hurt you. I can't tell you that the kiss meant nothing because the truth is, it meant everything. I've been wracking my brain all day trying to figure out how to tell you about all this, and now I'm sitting here rambling. I'm sorry Taylor I really am."

I paused to catch my breath and Taylor sat quietly for a few minutes. An uncomfortable silence settled between us and I wished she would say something. Hell I'd rather her sit there and call me an asshole instead of this silence. She started to giggle, which confused me.

"Good for you Buck," Taylor said at last, "I'm glad you've accepted your sexuality and your feelings. It takes a lot of courage to tell me all of this. Thank you for trusting me enough to let me in."

"Wait what? You're not upset?" I asked confusedly, "Why don't you seem surprised?"

"Honestly Buck I kinda saw this day coming," Taylor replied, "since I've known you I could see that you were keeping a lot of your walls up around me. It was obvious that something was eating away at you from the inside. Then I got to know you and realized that there was only one person that you were truly open with and that was Eddie. Buck I know you love me but, you're in love with Eddie. I'm proud of you that you've finally come to accept who you truly are. I'm also proud of you for trusting me enough to tell me the truth Buck. It means alot to me knowing that you felt comfortable enough with me to talk to me about this. That being said, I'm going to do what's best for you and for me. Buck you deserve to be truly happy and Eddie is the person that can make that happen. Eddie is where your heart lies, I'm in the way of that. You're such an incredible guy Buck and you're going to make Eddie and Christopher very happy. I'm glad that I've gotten to spend these past few months with you and I'm grateful for the times we've shared. I'll wait til tomorrow or Monday before I get my stuff out of your place for you; that way it's not a break up on Christmas. Buck I know you didn't want to hurt me and to be honest with you, you haven't hurt me at all. We're still gonna be friends Buck, that's not going to change; I just won't be your girlfriend anymore. Trust me it's for the best, you deserve to be happy Buck."

"You're really okay with this?" I questioned, "Like you're okay with me being bi and being in love with Eddie? Are you really okay with just ending our relationship and going back to being friends?"