Shy Eyes

1

In this fragment of time, nothing mattered. It was as if I was no longer there, and I didn't have to worry about anything. It was peaceful. I have never understood why people hated me for it. They will never understand what it is like for me, why being so absent minded and quiet is important to me. Why I needed this idle minded escape.

I sat in my brother Jonny's car and bore my eyes through the glass. I looked up at the blue sky that showed evidence that summer was almost over, and I lost myself. My eyes blurred over and a sudden form of unconsciousness washed over me. I was engulfed in thoughts about myself laying on my back in a meadow. Plants of lavender and beautiful flowers surrounding me and I had no care in the world. Then I was shaken out of the dream with a brutal awakening. We'd just run over a pot hole in the road. I looked to my left to see Jonny behind the steering wheel. He was my best friend. He resembled me in the fact that he had my black hair and green eyes. He was much taller than I was, and certainly more popular. He was a senior at Blue Pine Highschool. I, his little sister am two years younger than him. He's always been my guardian angel. He always wanted to be around me to protect me, and he had a kind heart. He loved and cared about so many people, some times I wish I could be like that. I know I never will be.

"Paisley, I'm sorry, but you know we have to do this-" Jonny spoke, taking his eyes away from the road, making me uneasy.

"I can't go. I'm not ready." I said keeping my gaze out the window.

"I know its your first day of school, but if you don't start then you wont leave a good first impression." Jonny said. Sometimes he acted like he was my dad. Sometimes I wished that my actual dad treated me like this.

"Why do I need to leave a good impression if we are just going to move in a year again anyway?" I said quietly as if I was speaking to myself.

Jonny sighed, then turned the car around and drove right back from the direction we were headed from.

Today was supposed to be my first day of school. I'm supposed to be a normal 16 year old Junior who shows up every day, does their homework, and fights towards getting good grades. For me it's different. I don't need to focus on getting good grades because every year my family and I move to a different town, where I get to just start all over. I don't need to focus on doing well for college because I am not going to college. I could never afford it, nor a scholarship. I couldn't earn a scholarship even if I tried. I'm not good at anything. No sports, no arts, no instruments, nothing. I am just simple. Boring.

We pulled into the driveway of an unfamiliar house. Oh wait...no, its the 500th house that I've moved into. It was a two story house painted a light yellow on the outside. The exterior theme of my house showed that we liked to keep high maintenance of our grass, flowers, bushes, decorations etc. It wasn't true though. Soon all those plants would die. It was honestly a cute house. I could never let myself grow an attachment though if we were just going to move again, like always. It looked like a friendly family house. We weren't a friendly family. It was bigger than the houses in the past but I decided to not think anything of it.

My mom works as a waitress at a gambling hotel, I'd rather prefer calling her a female who wears little clothes so the hotel can make more money. She doesn't make a lot of money and doesn't give a monkeys left nut about me or my brother. My dad just got a new job in this town, he is now the head of the police station. He's always been a policeman, but now he's boss. Both of our parents don't care about us. That's why I can barely be seperated from Jonny, he's my only family, my only friend. I'd be dead if it weren't for him. My parents always had more respect for Jonny though. They always thought of me as an oopsy baby who had no right in this family. Jonny wasn't treated well, but there were times when my parents would have a soft spot for him, and they actually listened when he talked to them.