Learning the Truth

Chapter 6

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Last goodbye

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Alexandra Walker P.O.V.

I wake up screaming to the same nightmare, my mom's death. It takes me forever to fall asleep and when I do, I wake up screaming with my head full of tears. I hug my knees in an attempt to calm myself down but it only makes me cry more.

I hear the door of the room open and soon after arms wrap around me comfortingly, but it didn't do a dent to this feeling inside of me. After what feels like hours later, I slowly calm down, but I feel exhausted all over again. Today is the day of my moms funeral though and I can't not go, I need to say goodbye at least one last time.

I straighten up and so does the nurse that held me through this. I look up and see nurse Rose looking at me with a smile.

"Hey honey I just came in to tell you Miss Smith is waiting for you outside. I also brought you this scrubs so you can get home." Rose tells me me pointing to the scrubs laying at the foot of my bed.

"Oh, I'll get ready quickly, just give me a minute and I'll be out of here."

"We'll be waiting for you outside sweetheart. " She gives me one last smile before walking out the door and closing it behind her.

I got out of the hospital bed and into the tiny en-suite bathroom this room had. I didn't want to think to much today, just let the day flow but at the same time my head keeps flooding with memories of all the best and worse memories I had with my mom.

Once during one of our conversations, we talked about how we want our funerals to be like and while I wanted to just be cremated and turned into jewelry my mom wanted to have her body returned to the earth and have something planted on top of it.

We dreamed of owning land someday and she wanted to be put there to rest, but the best I can do for now is return her body to the earth like she wanted. To my luck, I was told that that the person responsible for my moms funeral arrangements, took my requests into consideration. It's more than many are granted and for that, I can only be grateful.

I tie my hair into a lose bun and slip the mint green scrubs on. When I turn to the mirror behind the bathroom door I take a minute to look at myself in the mirror. I looked older... My eyes look dull and lifeless, my lips are dry and my hair is looking like I oiled it a bit too much. Anyone outside of this room could easily confuse me with one of the staff members.

I open the door and walk back into the room to get my black boots I had on, on the day of the accident. I don't think I can manage to use these boots anymore after today though. It's like the accident is imprinted on them somehow and just looking at it makes me remember the whole day that led to the accident. I just can't remember the damn accident but I guess i didn't lose much.

Once I was ready I got up and left the room slowly making my way to the nurses station. Standing there is a tall, large woman with long blond hair, her face is concealed by her hair since she is leaning against the counter and looking to her feet. I clear my throat feeling like suddenly something is blocking my throat, making her eyes immediately look up to me.

"You're Alexandra Walker aren't you?" I just nod at her still feeling the discomfort in my throat.

"Great, than we can get going. I got your bag back from evidence, but they are still holding onto your moms belongings that were on the car. I have no idea when they will release it, but as soon as they do I'll make sure to leave them at your house so you can decide what to do with it in two years." I just nod my head once more and continue to walk beside Miss Smith.