Irreplaceable

Two

HARRY

3 months ago

Its not like I don't miss her. Fuck do I miss her, but shes gone and theres nothing I can do about it. She has our baby and living in a better place with them.

I've gone back to my old ways. Partying every night, drinking and doing drugs to numb this horrible gut feeling I get all the time. But the one thing I can't seem to bring myself to do is, sleep with someone else. The thought repulses me and sometimes I've actually been sick. Every time I close my eyes she's there. She's smiling, her hair is down and slowly blowing in the air and her nose is blushed as the cold nips at it.

"Are you getting some vodka for tonight styles?" Louis asks as he walks into the room.

I shrug, trying to concentrate on my PlayStation. "I dunno."

I feel the sofa dip as someone sits next to me. "Are you going to get some coke tonight."

I shrug again "think so"

"Are you going to fuck some other chick tonight?"

I shrug again "not sure"

The words hit me and I pause the game and shoot my head to look at Louis "what no I'm fucking not." I feel my stomach churning with guilt as a small grin appears on his face.

I point at him "don't fucking start. You know exactly how I feel about that"

He holds his hands up acting like he hasn't done anything wrong "woah woah pal. I think it's just time you fuck some new pussy. It's been like what 4 months now? Niall got over poppy in like 2 days." He shrugs again.

Is shake my head and look back at the screen infront of me "no. Louis, Niall was with her for 2 months. I was with mya for over a year and she is carrying my child." I snap at him, my eyes not leaving the screen infront of me. I wish hed fuck off back to his own house now.

"C'mon harry. Its not a big deal. I bet shes probably fucking some other dude called Nathen right now." Louis says in a Monotone voice before the sound of a bottle opens from beside me. The thought of mya been with someone else makes me want to gauge my own eyes out with a knife but I remain calm because I know hes trying to get a reaction from me.

"When are you fucking back off to your house? Don't you have some work to do?" I mumble as I play this stupid fucking game.

"Yeah, well Niall said I can stay tonight. We are having a party. Im just going back to mine to finish up some shit and then I will be back."

I look at him again, hes now chugging his drink. "What here? In my fucking house?" I snap. Why do these pricks think its okay to throw stupid ass parties here? I turn my head over in the direction of the bathroom.

"Niall!" I shout. The sound of the toilet flushing and the taps running fill the quiet silence through the bottom floor for a minute or so before he appears. Running his fingers through his hair as the disgusting smell leaves the bathroom.

"Yeah buddy?" He questions, A small smile on his face.

"One fucking close that door. I don't want to smell your shit, and two when the fuck did I agree to a party here? Im all down for going to a house party. But not hosting one. No fucking way." I snap, pointing my controller towards him. "You can put me in so much fucking danger doing that. You do fucking realise that right?" I snap again, my anger slowly boiling over the tiny little pot.

Since been away from Mya, my patients has been running thin. I cannot be arsed with these dickheads. The only person I can really deal with right now is Liam and hes been a no show for three days because of some stupid fucking deal Ben got him into. For all we know he could be dead.

"Right. I never said we would have it here? Where the fuck did you get that from?" He gives me attitude back as he closes the door before walking back into my view. "And I fucking closed the door dipshit."

"Well that's what louis fucking said!" I raise my voice. Im just so fucked off. "Can you two just fuck off for a bit. Im tired of having to listen to all this stupid shit you get up to, when to be honest I do not give a flying fuck." I shrug my shoulders, my eyes darting between them before I look back at the screen.

"Someone has their underwear in a twist." Louis says sarcastically while taking the final swing of his drink before placing the bottle on the table.

I look at the glass on the table, what id do to just smash that over his cocky stupid head. "Put that in the fucking bin, will ya." I snap, ignoring his teasing remark.

"Put that in the bin will ya." Louis copies me in a high pitched voice. Right im done with this prick.

I slam the controller onto the table infront of me before Im jumping up from my seat and diving towards him, I tackle him to the floor. A loud groan coming from him as I wind the breath from his lungs. I smack his hands out from his face as he tries to cover his nose and eyes from my fists. "You fucking prick! You just know what buttons to fucking press with me to piss me off don't ya? Carry on and see what happens you fucking knobhead!" I shout in his face before getting up from him, making sure that I knee him in the stomach on the way up. My eyes meet Nialls, who is just watching the whole thing. Clearly amused.

"And you." I point towards him, immediately his face loses colour as I start walking towards him.

"Harry. I havent done anything, you wouldn't want to hurt your favourite Irish person now would you?" He questions, his voice slightly shaky.

I tilt my head to the side. "Actually, Conor McGregor is my favourite Irish person because he would be able to throw a good punch unlike you. You're like the milky bar kid on crack." I say in his face before I shove him with one hand. Niall goes flying on his arse. "Told you. Proper shit." I shake my head before I go to my own room to get my phone off charge. The sound of Niall and Louis bickering in the other room. I wish they would shut the fuck up honestly. I go to my notes and decide to read some old notes.

Mya ,

Hey gorgeous, how are you doing? I searched up earlier how big our little baby would be now and google said they would be around the same size as a carrot? A little fucking random. But pretty cool. I miss your pretty face, Have you managed to follow your dreams on becoming a singer? Well you already was one, but you was covering for the mafia. Crazy to think about it huh? I had to do a pretty adrenaline rush job today actually gorgeous. The whole plan was for me and Niall to grab a man and beat him to a pulp and then place a fine of 2 million dollars to some rival family and it was fucking funny seeing him cry and plead. But then it made me wonder, what you would do if that was me and that I got beaten up and you was faced with a terrifying video of me begging you to bring that large amount of money to some strangers for my freedom. But, its my job and if I don't do it right I end up worse than him, plus it only took twenty minutes of sending out the video to the family that we got the money that we needed and the man was set free. Of course, Ben had to make it more difficult than that and we had to place a chip into his arm so the rest of his little salves could watch this mans every other move. See what this other family does so Ben can raid them. Anyway my love. I will speak to you soon, I have to go get ready for some stupid party. I promise I will try and cut down on my partying habits once this horrible gut feeling goes away for good. All my love –H

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YYAYAYA IM LOVING THIS SM!!! ALSO I WANTED TO LET YOU ALL KNOW IM SEEING HARRY IN MANCHESTER AND IM SO FUCKING EXCITED HAHAHHAHANSND ANYWAY I LOVE YOU ALL <33333