Worth sinning for(Salvis)

So You're Telling Me You're Weak?

(Travis pov)

He smells like the same dove shampoo I use. He's warm. The warmth in my stomach is nothing I've ever felt before. But it's wrong. A boy should never feel this way about another boy.

I step away wiping my shirt as if to wipe away what just happened.

"Sal I appreciate you for your help. The lord will treat you kindly in the afterlife but I have to get home." His eyes seem distressed

"But Trav" he begins but I cut him off. I need to get out of here before my dad realizes I left, or worse I stay here.

"Goodbye sally face" I say, opening the front door and walking out. The cold air hits my face and reality pounds into my brain like a freight train. I have a pounding headache and my body aches. I have to walk at least a mile to get back home. Fuck. I walk a block away from the apartments and call my father on a random payphone.

"Hello father, I would like to apologize for how I acted... can you come pick me up?" I really shouldn't have left the house. Now Sal will think badly of my father. How disgraceful of me.

"Yes son, where are you?" I can hear the anger behind his voice.

I tell him where I am and he hangs up. I look around me and realize how cold I am. The adrenaline must have worn off. I'm only wearing a sweater and jeans plus my hair was cold when I left. It clung to my face as the wind blew. I need a haircut.

His car rolls around the corner and the door opens. My mother is in the front and my dad pushed it open from the inside. I climb in and place my head on the seat in front of me.

The car ride is excruciatingly silent and all I can think about is Sally Face and the way he hugged me. But he's not gay. He said it today so even if I did tell everyone I was a homo- no I'm not a faggot.

The car pulls into the driveway and my dad walks inside. I follow him. My mothers on the couch practically shaking. My father sits at the table and has me sit on the other side.

"Where did you go Travis?" He questions but I can answer him truthfully. He's seen Sally Face and told me he was a fag and not to talk to him.

"Just a ike ride. To blow off some steam but I got too tired to bike back." It's the best I can think of.

"So you're telling me you're weak?" I can feel the satisfaction in his voice.

"Yes sir" I don't look up at him I don't want to see him.

"Good job son for admitting the truth. I'm sure the lord can forgive your behavior from today." the says in a scarily calm voice. I nod and say goodnight to my parents before heading to my room.

I didn't close the window all the way when I left so there's a breeze in my room but I don't mind it that much. I flop onto my bed. Bored and still hurting and sore from my dads beating. I wish I could just be numb. Just not feel anymore.

After a few hours of staring at the ceiling the house goes silent so I sneak downstairs and into the liquor cabinet. My dad drinks when he's upset. Maybe it makes him feel better. Will it make me feel better?

I open the bottle and take a swig. It's disgusting. But I have to find out why my dad likes it so I take it back up to my room.

It's now 2 am and I drank almost half of it. I kind of get it. I'm not numb though, I just feel a little happier. But it's artificial and won't last. I don't like this feeling. I sneak it back downstairs then sit on my bed.

I spotted the razor my dad got me for my 15th birthday since I'm a "man" now. I grabbed it, it's cold and smells like medal and blood from when I tried to use it with no instruction and cut myself. I bled all over it.

I unscrew the blades and pull one out and take it to my wrist.

It's like I'm not even in my body anymore. It's like I'm floating above my body watching my actions un-able to stop.

When I do stop my arm is all bloody so I go to the bathroom and wrap it in bandages then I pass out for the night.

(Sal POV)
I don't know why I like Travis. I feel like I could make him my friend, he's just got a lot of problems. At least he asked for help yesterday. Even if he did leave immediately after.

My dad calls for me

"Sal come on you have to go" he says.

I go out into the living room and see Larry and my dad talking on the couch. When Larry spots me he gets up and pulls me into what he calls the "bro walk" which is where he has his arm on my shoulder and tells me whatever's on his mind.

After we get out of the apartments he asks

"Are you okay y'know after Travis punched you?"

"Yeah but he came to my apartment last night all beat up, he was covered with scars and bruises. I helped him but then he freaked out and left" Travis laugh

"Hah bet his daddy beats him, deserves it '' I push away from him. Larry is meaner than me and sometimes it's funny but it's not funny to joke like that.

"Larry that not fucking funny, his dad does hit him but it's nothing to joke about" Larry looks defensive

"Well maybe if he wasn't such a prick" I punch him in the arm. Not hard but hard enough to send a message.

"Okay okay!" He responds. Raising his hands in the air in defense. When we get to Lisa's car we get in and the car ride to school is silent.(A/N 1014 words!! Thanks for all the love on my other fic!!)