We Rose Up Slowly

Chapter Three

"She was all jittery and shit,"

"Most smokers are like that tho," Kim talked with her mouth half full of salad. "All anxious and fidgety."

"But she isn't, at least when she smokes," Trixie took a sip of her water. "She closes her eyes like she's having the most relaxing bath ever."

"You're really fixated on her smoking," Kim frowned while grabbing more food with her fork.

"Only because it upsets me."

"Maybe you like watching her," Kim teased.

"What? No! Going to my dorm and seeing her is the part I dread the most of the whole day."

"I wanna talk to her, at least once."

"Nothing is stopping you," Trixie put the fork into her mouth, tasting the noodles. "Except the fact that you'll be annoyed for the rest of your life."

"She cannot be that bad," Kim said convinced. "Naomi knows her girlfriend."

Trixie choked slightly on her food, hoping that Kim didn't notice it. "Girlfriend? I didn't know she had a girlfriend,"

"Her name's Violet, she's a model, she has black hair, maybe you've even seen her around here."

"Oh," Just like she thought, it was the girl she saw sitting with Katya a few days ago. "What is she like?"

"A bitch," Kim said deadpanned.

"Fitting."

"But they say Katya's her soft spot, so Katya cannot be that bad."

"That's because you don't live with her, and Violet doesn't either." Trixie gestured with her hand while she talked. "I'm the one who has to put up with the Russian music blasting at eight A.M and her sassy comments."

Kim went back to her food, not saying anything else. Trixie saw a bit of hesitation, opening her mouth and quickly closing it. But she didn't so Trixie considered it a win. They enjoyed the rest of their lunch in silence, watching as the students passed by. Trixie was a bit surprised about how fast she got used to this routine, or at least how half used to it she got. Of course, she would huff and roll her eyes when she had to do something by herself, almost anything. And also how she would be upset if someone didn't automatically do as they got told. And also how she had to deal with people every day, trying to be as nice as possible. But it was a work in progress, she considered. The only progress she had made being, talking to Kim, folding her own clothes, and learning to do Mac N Cheese from a youtube video. 

Trixie shook her head slightly enough so Kim wouldn't point it out. Did Katya get into her head or something? Why was she being self-critical all of the sudden? What was living like a normal human being doing to her? Katya would probably make fun of her if she could hear her thoughts. She would say something like 'Welcome to having a working brain' or something like that, telling her that she never had to think more than five minutes before someone came running to her asking her what she wanted. Trixie caught herself smiling, her eyes widened a bit at the realization. Katya wasn't funny, she was an asshole. She was just a fucking bully that bullied Trixie for a life she didn't even choose. Yeah, Katya wasn't funny, not at all. Trixie frowned and went back to her noodles, not noticing Kim looking at her with a suspicious glare.

-

Katya impatiently looked down to her phone, praying that God would make the last minutes of this class turn into seconds. She looked down to her wrist, where she got a cross tattooed. Even if she didn't believe in God since she was twelve, right now she was praying to him. Katya was used to wanting to run out of places, and typically she would, since most people in her life knew about her troubled history with mental health. But in college, none of the people in this room gave a fuck about her and how she felt. Sure she could walk out of the class, but the students would look at her, they would pay attention to her. And when you are dealing with such high levels of anxiety, attention isn't really welcomed. You knew you couldn't do this and you still signed up for this, all because you're spoiled and everything is given to you. No, we are not doing that, I earned this. Katya looked at the clock, her hand hovering over the cigarettes in her pocket. She smiled widely when it was time to leave, collecting her things and basically running out of the class.