The Dark Lord's Seer

Mercy

** TW: The following chapter contains mention of physical and sexual abuse. DO NOT READ if you are not prepared to encounter such content. **

When I opened my eyes the next morning, the first thing I saw was my battered and abused wrist, which I'd carefully propped up on a spare pillow beside me before falling asleep. I stared at it, considered it.

The wrist, a tangible example of Tom's hold on me, was upsetting to be sure. But far more disturbing was the acknowledgement that I'd actually let him get me off last night for the first time. Well, to be fair to myself, that wasn't my fault. He would have forced an orgasm out of me whether or not I'd wanted one, of that I was completely certain. And one can't blame themselves for that - that was rape. If that were the case, I wouldn't be so troubled. Unfortunately, my feelings were made more complicated. I had to acknowledge the fact that I'd wanted to orgasm under his hand. I'd immensely enjoyed the sexual component of last night, despite the fact that I obviously hated Tom with every fibre of my being.

What does that say about me? How could I betray myself so unforgivably?

I exhaled and carefully sat up, gingerly cupping my right arm against my chest as I slid out of bed. It was a strange thing, to hate someone and yet desire them at the same time. I stilled for a moment as I considered that maybe Tom felt the same way about me.

No, I shook my head, I don't think so. For Tom, our encounters are just a means to an end. Obviously. Right?

Getting dressed was extremely difficult considering my physical condition. But I managed eventually, though it took me longer than usual and I looked a bit more unkempt than I'd like.

I fell back onto my bed and closed my eyes. Tom had mentioned he'd fix my wrist today. But would he actually? Probably depended on his mood. Important not to get my hopes up. Knowing Tom, he might decide to leave it like this indefinitely.

Eventually, a knock on my door. I groaned and slid back off the bed and onto my feet, "Yes?"

Let them come in, let them take the trouble of opening it.

I refused. My left hand was too busy cradling my right.

The door creaked open and I winced internally. Rabastan, his dark brown eyes staring at me with an expression of unmistakable contempt. He shrugged, his shoulder length jet black hair swishing slightly from side to side as he did so, "Let's go. Our Lord's waiting."

Your Lord, I thought abhorrently. Not mine - never mine.

But today I didn't have the energy to bite back. I was in too much pain. So I simply rolled my eyes and followed after him.

When the doors to the study opened for us, I felt my heart drop: Tom and Rashaad, seated together, otherwise completely alone.

This felt positively dangerous. Though I knew in reality Ra and I were always in great peril, something about the two of us being alone with Tom made me feel dizzy with fear.

Tom alone, I could handle; Tom and Rashaad together in a group: not optimal, but doable. But the three of us alone? Ra and I were going to have to be extremely careful with how we played this.

I stepped forward hesitantly, vaguely aware of the sound of Rabastan shutting the door behind him as he left.

"Come," Tom's eyes flitted over to mine as he gestured me over impatiently.

I strode over and slid into the seat beside him. As I brought my hands to rest very carefully on my lap, I felt Tom's hand slip onto me, snaking its way up my back before finally coming to rest at the base of my neck. He gripped me tightly, possessively. Bringing his lips to my ear, he whispered silkily, "Don't mind us. Just finishing up some business."

I nodded, my eyes glued to my lap. I didn't look at Ra. I didn't dare to. Far, far too risky. What if I did something unconscious with my body language that betrayed me, or he did? Then what? We'd be dead in the water.

The two of them sat staring at one another in silence. It didn't take me very long to realise they were sharing thoughts with one another using their abilities. I sat beside Tom, still as a statue, not daring to move and hardly daring to breathe.

Several minutes passed, and throughout it all I was extremely on edge, though I trusted Ra to be able to shield his true thoughts and intentions from Tom.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, Tom nodded and relaxed in his seat, "Yes, well. Some interesting things to think about, hmm?"

Rashaad's reply, smooth as black velvet, "Indeed, my Lord."

Tom gestured at the door dismissively, "Anyway, Shafiq, you have my gratitude, as always. Go and handle it."

"Yes, my Lord."

I listened to the sound of Rashaad rise up and out of his seat. Meanwhile, Tom's hold on the nape of my neck remained steady. Suddenly, he left out a sharp laugh, "Oh, and Shafiq?"

For the first time, I dared raise my eyes upwards. I watched as Ra turned back to Tom, "My Lord?"

Tom chuckled under his breath, "Remind me again, your family's motto? What is it, 'Always in Mercy?' Some soft dribble like that?"

Rashaad shook his head, "Forgive my Lord, no. Rather, 'Mercy and Loyalty.'"

I stiffened at this, as though someone had prodded me with an electric shock. Tom, somehow oblivious to my reaction, shook his head smiling sharply, "Yes, well. When serving me, always forget the first part entirely and put complete emphasis on the last, yes?"

"Of course my Lord. Always."

I barely registered Rashaad leaving the room, and Tom's hand slipping back down my back slowly, his palm rubbing at the small of my back.

My brain was stuck on repeating one word, over and over: Mercy.