Living my life as a desk-job worker and sticking my face to the magical screen that projects images and videos they call monitor. Mindlessly running my fingers through the keyboard and do whatever they told me to do. I'm living a life without a cho...
Ugh, my head. Can't stop spinning. I'm wrapped in blanket? When did I? Teresa. I'm sorry.
"Teresa! Honey?"
No answer. What time is it? I check my wrist watch. Almost nine!? She already left for work. Guess I have to call it in for today. Checking my pocket for changes. Looks like I'm lucky. Time to look for a phone booth.
"Hello, how may I help?" "Hello, can you tell Ms Holms that I might not make it work today? I'm feeling not well today. Tell her it was Scott."
I hang up the phone and go back to my apartment. Time for a shower! I stare at the shower head and water splashes my chest. I can't stop thinking about Teresa. I never left her on her own before. Must be scary for her. I'm sorry baby girl. I never meant to do this to you. If only I stepped out of the car. If only I said no to Ryan. If only...
DING DONG
Hm? A doorbell? Is it Teresa? But she is supposed to be at work right now.
"A second!"
I dried myself as quick as I can and wrap myself in towel. I rush to the door and open the door.
"Teresa?"
No, it is not Teresa.
"Hello Scott."
It's her mother.
"Mind if I come in?" "S-sure. Make yourself at home. Sorry for you to see me like this, I was showering. Let me change real quick."
I dress as fast as I can, I grab whatever is in the closet and wear them. Her mother is sitting at the living room and waiting for me.
"Uhm, Coffee?" "Don't bother. I am here to talk."
Oh shit. I walk back to the living room and sit across her.
"You must be wondering why I'm here." "Y-yes. It is about Teresa, isn't it?" "Yes."
She crosses her leg and look at me with a fierce look.
"Last night, she called me. Sh-" "It was my fault. I shouldn't hang out with those co-workers of mine. They insisted for me to join them, I had no choice!" "Would you please listen to me first?"
Huh?
"She called me and told me that she is fine. She just misses home. But I know, Scott. She has never called me before. Ever since you were both graduated and lived together, she never called me. It was a sign for me that my baby girl is trusting her life to you. I had no choice but to trust her, Scott. Ever since she was young, she wanted to have a father that never beat her or a father that would bought her a birthday gift every birthday. Or a father that would showed up to her talent show and supported her in every way. It was until you showed up, Scott. Every birthday, it was you that showed up and brought her gifts. You showed up at her talent show and she performed her best that day. Graduation day, you, me and her took a picture together. Ever since you showed up in our life, she never asked about her father anymore. She looked at you as a man who would do anything just to see her smiling. She hates our home but when you were there, it was a haven for her."
She is tearing up.
"I can hear that she was crying when she called me. Tell me, Scott, did you hurt my girl!?"
My mouth open wide, words won't come out of me.
"I-I.."
I take a big breathe
"She told me that she wanted to have a family with me. Like actually family. Me and her having kid. I was not ready for that. You know me for a long time. You know that I don't have a parent figure or anyone to look up to. I was living by myself my whole life. I don't know what perfect family is but I want to give her that. I wish I can give her everything, and a little bit more but I can't!"
She stares at me.
"So that is your answer..."
She gets up and walk to the door.
"I'm sorry, Scott. I looked at you as my own but..."
She expresses her sadness on her face.
"I don't think Teresa will feel the same anymore."
She shuts the door close and her footsteps are slowly fading as she is leaving the apartment.
I lay on the sofa and stares at the empty ceiling. My eyes are beginning to tear up. The pain in my chest. Is this sadness? No. This is helpless. I'm sorry, Teresa. Looks like I have to do it.
7 p.m
DING DONG
"Scotty, I'm bac-"
She opens the door and standing still when she looks at me. I can't forget that look. You were surprised that night. I packed your stuff.
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"Teresa, listen to me."
She leaps onto me and hugs me as tight as ever. She seals my lip with a finger.
"Ssh. I know. I just didn't know that this is your answer. But first, let's have a coffee. I got a fresh packed coffee bean for you here~!"
She goes to the kitchen and begins to brew those coffee bean. A few minutes later, she brings two mugs of coffee and gives one to me. It is an awkward silence between us. I look at her, she just keep smiling at me and hums. I decide to break the silence.
"Teresa, I just want you to know that, all these years, you are the best thing that has happened to me. But, we can't do this anymore. I wish I can stay longer with you. Hell, I even want to spend my whole life with you but I can't give you what you wanted your whole life. So, tell me, Teresa. Is there anything I can do for you to stay-"
She puts her mug down and kisses me.
"Scott, I know you would even trade your soul to the devil just to stay with me a second longer. Years, I've been standing in the same spot with you. I have hopes and dreams but I threw it all away just because I believed in you. But I can't wait any longer. All these pictures and memories, it will haunts us cause it will reminds us how wonderful those times were. I will miss your laughter, your tears, your warmth, your kisses..."
She begins to sob
"But I can't do it anymore, Scott. You have to let me go. You have to let me let you go. I need you to do that."
She gets up and grabs her stuff. She looks at me for one last time.
