Spirals || Mattheo Riddle

Chapter 48 ~ Lonely

A/N: NEW COVER ART BY Nnnnothinggggg !!!
Also gonna be cannon divergence from here on out x

Mattheo Riddle and Draco Malfoy would not be seen publicly for a month after the events that transpired at Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry. 

And what a lonely month it was. 

I kept my head down, didn't let eye contact last too long with anyone, didn't cause disturbances. 

My hands trembled at the very idea of someone finding out about what I had done that night. 

Some might argue that my hands were clean, spotless of any blood. But the way I poked and teased at the crack in my soul at nighttime said otherwise. 

It felt like a piece of me wasn't truly there, like it was hanging on by a thread. And the itch, the need to seal it back together was like none other. 

Pansy, Theo and Blaise were pacing around my dorm when I finally picked up the gall to leave the room of requirements. I had needed something familiar. I had conjured my room from back at home. 

Hogwarts didn't feel like home anymore. 

It was on my way back, scurrying through the corridors, trying to blend into the wall, that everything went to shit. 

~

An arm grabbed me, pulling me into the nearest alcove that hid us from whatever students may be moving up and down the corridors at this time of morning. The school was on lock down, do likely none but the safety it provided was still comforting. 

"I know what you did Raven." 

I looked up into green eyes, covered only slightly by jet black hair. 

Harry Potter was taller than me, if only by a little- but I felt incredibly small in that moment. 

"I don't know what you're-" 

"You killed him!" He half screamed. I didn't bother to check around us, the hallways were empty.

Potter was foaming at the mouth, eyes red from excessive amounts of crying. But he wasn't crying now. Instead his eyes were glazed over in fury. 

"I-" I froze as the tip of his wand came to rest over my heart. "Potter, there is seriously something wrong with you, I didn't kill anyone." 

"I was there," he hissed. "Below the floors. I saw everything." 

Fuck.

Something in me snapped. That little piece of my soul felt a million miles away, the love of my life had just left, I had nearly fucking killed someone within the last eight hours. And all to help my friends, all because I felt the fucking need to be the person to protect them. 

And now Potter felt the need to get in my face and threaten me. He should have known better. 

I could almost swear the scars across my chest and stomach stung as I stepped closer, pushing the wand firmly into my chest. 

"If you were there then you know I didn't kill him. And if you were there, why didn't you come out? Try and save him? You're a fucking coward Potter. You're as much of a killer as I am." 

He flinched and his hands began to tremble. 

"Let me fill you in, seeing as no one else has the heart to tell you. You are not fucking special. You can't save any of us. We look out for each other, try and make it through the day, but at the end of it? When we're all lying dead in a pile and our names go on the memorials, you'll be there still looking like a fucking hero, no matter what price we pay."