𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝𝐧'𝐭 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝 | 𝐆𝐢𝐲𝐮𝐮𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐨

Chapter 13 | Cherished Memories

Tomioka silently walked through the butterfly estate with Shinobu on his back. He was tired from the long day but he didn't mind carrying her, after all, she was almost light as a feather. Sometimes, he even wondered if she had fallen off or something because she almost weighed nothing.

Her perfect oval-shaped face rested on his shoulder, her eyes barely open. The bags under her eyes became more visible once she had stopped crying, and now, she was just numb.

As he gently placed her down on her mattress, he looked at her face with a pitiful expression. 

All this time, she had suffered so much behind that smile.

"You're good at sneaking your way past people, I don't think anyone saw us," she softly spoke, followed by a quiet chuckle.

The sun had set by now, it was pitch black outside and the clouds covered all traces of any moonlight. The stars also seemed to have disappeared and the sky was nothing but an endless black canvas.

Tomioka was about to turn around and leave the room but he stopped at the sight of her lonely face, hopelessly leering at the walls.

The room remained soundless for another long period of time. Both of them were staring blankly at the floor before Tomioka finally broke the silence.

"Do you feel alright now?" he awkwardly questioned, trying anything to stop her quiet sulking.

She lifted her head slightly, her eyes still half-covered by her ruffled, loose bangs. She nodded once, barely moving her face. She wasn't sure if Tomioka had seen it but she couldn't find the strength to speak again, she was afraid the tears would come running again if she spoke.

"Ok," he replied, returning his glare to the timber flooring.

Shinobu sat on her soft mattress whilst Tomioka sat cross-legged on the bare floor.

"And you?" She questioned him back, trying to sound polite.

Tomioka looked at her, she was forcing a smile on her face again, although he could see the tears in her eyes, she was also smiling.

"Rengoku was a great guy," he answered, "He was good company, I liked it when he attempted conversations with me."

Normally, Shinobu would've teased him about his choice of wording but this time, she didn't feel any need to do so, she just wanted some company.

"Of course, he was a great guy, always in such a bright, enthusiastic mood," she replied.

"Tomioka, do you remember that time he bought us twenty bento boxes?"

He nodded.

"Well he ended up actually eating ten of those when he got back," she smiled, recalling her memories.

"How come I never got one."

"Yeah, Uzui ended up taking yours too since you didn't seem interested." She laughed, a little more genuinely this time.

Tomioka smiled at the sight of her laughing again, it had almost been four days since he last saw a tiny pinch of genuine joy from her; she even stopped socializing for a few days since Rengoku's passing.

"Just for a little bit, let me, Shinobu," he yawned, before laying down on Shinobu's lap.

A frenzy of emotions rushed through her as his long black hair touched her uniform. 

The evening had been such a blur to Shinobu, it was almost as if she had gone through the day in 'auto-pilot', she didn't even realise that all this time, Tomioka had been calling her Shinobu.

She looked down at Tomioka and smiled at the realisation. He was laying so innocently, his face tilted upwards and once again, their eyes interlocked.

"You're crying again."

Oh shoot, why am I crying?

"I-I-I didn't mean to, the tears just started coming out, I don't know why."

Tomioka sat back up. A concerned emotion was plastered on his face now, his innocent look earlier was nowhere to be found.

He wiped her tears once, then twice. 

Shinobu waved her two hands in front of her face and tried avoiding all eye contact with Tomioka.

"P-please don't worry about me," she softly murmured, hiding her tear-stained face.

Tomioka stared at her with his siren eyes, he couldn't bear seeing her cry anymore.

He wrapped his two arms around Shinobu's head, letting her cry into him again. 

"You can cry, don't worry," he said, patting her head with one hand, embracing her with the other, "Rengoku would want you to keep fighting, all those cherished memories with him, he would want you to keep them close and become stronger with them."

Shinobu wrapped her arms around Tomioka even tighter, crying harder into his chest.

Once she was done, she let go of Tomioka, she saw his face, it was full of sadness and sorrow.

Tomioka slowly began to get up and he smiled a tiny smile at her, "I'll let you rest, you seem really tired."

She didn't reply, she only looked at him with a look of emptiness as he closed the door behind him.

***

The room was dark now, all the lights were already turned off and all that was left in the room was a numb Shinobu, glaring at the ceiling, hoping the tears would go away.

"I did it again," she whispered quietly to herself, "I made myself a burden on him again, didn't I?"