Under Coloured Trees || Larry Stylinson

32

ATTENTION THIS IS URGENT!!!

Remember I added something else (3k words :)) to last chapter, so if you've only read the part about Harry putting Louis to bed but NOT THE ONE WHERE LOUIS WAKES UP LATER, YOU NEED TO GO BACK AND READ IT BEFORE READING THIS.

PLEASE THAT IS IMPORTANT

DON'T START IF YOU HAVEN'T READ THE NOTE ABOVE

URGENT

I'M DEAD SERIOUS

LISTEN TO THE AUTHOR SHE HAS A POINT

AUTHOR'S NOTES ARE IMPORTANT STUFF YOU GOTTA READ

IF YOU GOT TIME FOR SMUTT YOU GOT TIME FOR THIS

ok i think that's enuf

MAYBE ONE MORE

READ THE AUTHOR'S NOTE

:)


OH also TW ig cuz self-harming is kinda mentioned but like they just make reference to it not a big deal I'm just saying cuz Sahana always reminds me I should add the TW

***

Louis never thought he would be back here so soon. At least not alone. Not without someone that will assure him he is actually welcome there.

He doesn't remember the way to Harry's house from the station. Last time he'd had the boy to blindly follow, and he'd focused more on the actual place than on how many left or right turns they had taken, so now he's able to find the way by asking for directions to random people. Louis has definitely never been more grateful for a small town before.

He doesn't know what he's doing. He genuinely has no idea. He doesn't know what he's going to say and he's not even sure he wants to say it. But coming all the way to Holmes Chapel already puts him in a too vulnerable position to be concerned by anything else. Sometimes he just doesn't understand himself. Maybe because he doesn't have the guts to. But he's trying to heal, he's determined to do it, not only for him but for the people he's managed to surround himself with and who don't deserve to just be collateral damage in Louis' violent process of self-destruction. He's trying to heal and he realises that he doesn't need to understand it in order to do it.

He finally stops in front of the house he knows Harry hates. But he knows he secretly loves it, too. Because, where there is a lot of love, there can also be a lot of hatred. The line is very thin and extremely easy to cross but there are always remains left behind and he knows Harry feels everything strongly enough to hold on to those remains for as long as he can even if that destroys him.

Louis rings the bell and stands before the white door. It's not only white, it's blank. Empty. It has no meaning for Louis and probably too many for Harry. But it isn't home. It doesn't feel like what Harry's home would look like. It doesn't look like what Louis would want his home to feel like.