Game Over ~AntiAverage

24. Anti

"Ok, Sam... Can you hear me?" That voice filled the black around me and I narrowed my eyes. I... I know that voice right? I have to... "Sam?"

"Yes... I hear you." I felt a phantom hand on mine and I smiled a bit. I didn't understand it but. I felt safe. I felt loved. It... It wasn't something I was used to.

"Ok, good... that's good. Where are you right now?" I frowned looking around me. There was nothing. Literally nothing.

"Just... black." I was just standing there in this pitch-black void. I couldn't tell you a damn thing. I couldn't tell you how I got there, or why.

"Sam, I need you to do something for me? Ok?" I narrowed my eyes as his voice shook slightly. "I need you to think of a memory. I need... I need you to think of a time you attacked one of Sean's egos." I started to shake as the anxiety burn through me. A time... I attack them... Why? "Think of a time that you attack because you were very sad. Tell me what you see." The world slowly began to change and I frowned seeing that I was standing there in front of Sean's house. "Sam... what do you see?"

"Sean's house." I whispered out as I looked around. I could feel this familiar pull. No not Anti... that dark pull on my mind that makes my chest heavy. That sad and lonely blanket that threatened to suffocate me. I gripped my shirt as the tears started to fall and I frowned. "Why? What..."

"Sam?!" Shit... I fell to my knees as the feeling overcame me. I felt like shit. I wanted to just curl up and sleep. I wanted to disappear. I wanted... I wanted to die. Even if I couldn't... I wanted it. I was a monster. A demon... pathetic. I couldn't even find my own creator for years. I was just stuck... stuck with my own pathetic mind. "Sam, what's going on?"

"I'm just... I'm just crying. I... I feel... like shit." I felt the hand squeeze hard as I just sat there. "Why? Why do I feel like this? I shouldn't... I shouldn't feel like this. I..." Depression doesn't work like that Sam. Neither does bipolar disorder, we can't control our emotions. We just... try to work through them. I feel like shit. I looked up towards Sean's house and I frowned. Sam, I know what your thinking. It's not a good idea. I. feel. like. shit. I understand that but attacking them... It's fine. All there going to do is kick my ass anyway. "It'll hurt." That's not a good thing, Sam... "They'll win. They always win. Always..." What about Sean, huh? I thought you wanted to protect him? "They'll protect him. I'll... I'll just go after..." Chase? He's got a gun. Perfect. NO NOT PERFECT!

"Sam, what are you doing?" I slowly stood up feeling the darkness push me harder. It hurts... It hurts but... I don't know. I want them to see how much I hurt. I want them... I don't know what I want. I spotted Chase through the window and my blood ran cold. Sam, don't...

"Shut up, Anti." I called out as I cracked my neck. I let myself glitch out teleporting over to the window. A blast of energy tore through it causing it to shatter inward and Chase had to shield himself against the glass that cut him.

"Sam?" I narrowed my eyes hearing the phantom voice. "Tell me what's happening."

"I attacking Chase... that's what's happening." I smiled seeing Chase look back at me with fear in his eyes as I slowly glitched through the wall into the house.

"Why?" I smiled brightly hiding the fact that I felt like total crap. "Why attack him?"

"I feel like shit and he has a gun. It's not the first time I've attack someone during an episode. It's always an episode... of some sort." I laughed maniacally and Chase reached for his gun. When was this again? What day was it? I narrowed my eyes looking around and I frowned spotting the tree and presents. "Chrismas? It's Christmas?"

"ANTI!" I felt this sharp pain in my shoulder and I looked over to see a gunshot. I just smiled as I looked over at Chase.

"Now I remember. I was depressed because it was Christmas... and like always, I was alone." Chase shot again hitting my other shoulder and I just laughed glitching through the pain that tore through me. This was nothing. Nothing compared to the pain I felt already.