Drowning In Shallow Water

~ 2 ~

The funeral was a tedious affair. We didn't have any relatives, just friends and acquaintances who bothered to show up. They were polite as they gave me their condolences and tried not to ask why we couldn't see Danny's body. Someone did and I rudely replied that they could see his minced up form if they wanted to. No one said anything on that matter again.

I was exhausted by the entire thing. I just wanted it all to end. The pitiful glances, the constant apologies, offers to help and the pain. Especially the pain. I wanted it to go away. Brianna had offered to stay with me but I turned her down. She had lost her first love and was trying to be strong for me. I was grateful but I couldn't accept that.

"Hello Nicola," Mr Martin said after knocking on my door.

I had been holding a mug of cold coffee in my hands when the soft knock broke me out of my trance. The apartment was a mess since I did not have it in myself to remove any of Danny's things from their place.

Standing next to Mr Martin was a small woman with thick red glasses and a wide smile. Her green eyes twinkled, her brown hair pulled back in a messy bun. I stared at them both, since they obviously had something to say to me. I felt annoyed that someone was disturbing my grieving and because my ankle still hadn't healed yet. It had an irritating ache that drove me mad.

"Hello Nicola. I'm Ms Crosse," the woman introduced herself. "I'm from social services and---"

I groaned, rolling my eyes. I couldn't believe this. Danny had only just been buried, the soil still upturned. Couldn't I just grieve in peace?

"Danny worked hard..." I croaked then swallowed hard to moisten my throat. "Danny worked hard to get me out of the system so we could... We could be together, as a family. And now you want to throw me back there?"

Ms Crosse's smile faltered. "I'm sorry to hear that, Nicola."

"And I guess you're sorry that Danny's dead? Well, so am I but that doesn't change anything," I spat. "Please just leave me alone."

"Nicola---"

"I'm almost eighteen. It's just six months until..."

"I'm afraid we can't do that, Nicola. I'm sure you know how this works," Mr Martin spoke up, destroying all the fight in my tired body. "Can we come in?"

My shoulders slumped as I sighed and stepped aside, walking ahead to the living room. I slouched in the couch, feeling numb. I knew I had no control over what was going to happen to me. With Danny gone, I didn't see a need to resist anymore.

"Before Daniel Ashton passed, he made arrangements for you to stay somewhere safe if something were to happen to him," Ms Crosse explained after cleaning the crumbs from the couch as best as she could.

I frowned. "Danny wouldn't do that... We planned to be together as a family. He made sure of it."

"I'm sure it was in case of an emergency. Probably because of your parents' sudden death, he had to be sure you would have a home to turn to. Therefore, guardianship will be given to the Windrow Family," Ms Crosse explained.

I sighed again. I guess I'll be doing that a lot from now on. I didn't care anymore. I was going to let social services drag me around for the next six months of my life. Arguably, it isn't long. Maybe I could use this time to grieve and heal before deciding what I was going to do with my life now that Danny is out of the picture. We were meant to do everything together and now...

I contemplated all my options as I turned to Mr Martin. "Can't I stay with you? It's just for six months."

The old man shook his head sadly. "I can't. I can barely take care of myself. Plus, legally, the new family has some obligation towards you. They can't just let you stay, even with me."

"When do I leave?" I asked, grudgingly giving in. "And what about this apartment? Danny had a three year lease."

"I'll refund you and find new tenants. Don't worry about it," Mr Martin guaranteed.

I bit my lip. "Can you not? I mean, until the time in the lease agreement is over. Just take care of it for us... For me."

"Of course," Mr Martin said with a sad, soft smile.

"We can leave for the Windrow Estate whenever you're ready," Ms Crosse told me.

I'll never be ready.

The next morning, a black Cadillac SUV was parked in front of the apartment as my bags were hauled in the back. I had spent the previous night trying to come to terms with my life, but I didn't succeed. The clouds were picking up, dimming the morning sunlight. The wind blew into my dull black hair as I slid into the back seat next to Ms Crosse, an unfamiliar driver starting the car and driving away from my home.

The open fields and deep woods were all I could see as we drove out of the city, taking a foreign and almost nonexistent dirt path. I could have worried that I could get killed out here and no one would ever find me. To my slight relief, a red roof peaked from the tree tops as proof of some form of civilization. A quaint cream house came into view, two children chasing each other in the front garden. There were visible clusters some distance away as well, thankfully. A woman with flowing blonde hair stood in front of a tall man as she fixed his clothes. It looked like a typical happy family, something Danny and I always envied.

"Do you like it?" Ms Crosse asked as the car slowed to a halt, a warm smile on her face. "Martha and Andrew are very nice people. I'm sure you'll like them."

I sighed, not bothering to reply. The said couple approached the car with wide smiles, their children stopping their running to peer at me as I got out of the car. Ms Crosse shook hands with the couple before placing a hand on my shoulder, drawing attention to me.

"Meet Nicola Ashton. Nicola, this is Martha and Andrew and their children, Luther and Anna. You'll be staying with them for a while," she introduced.

"It is so nice to meet you, Nicola. You look really beautiful," Martha said, squeezing me in a hug that I couldn't run away from. "We're happy to have you join our family. Feel at home. How about we go inside?"

"I'll bring the bags," Andrew kindly offered, assisting the driver who was taking my bags from the car.

The house was more beautiful inside. The furniture was all modern, with a white and gold theme. The front door led to a large lounge with comfy looking couches and a crystal chandelier hanging over the glass coffee table. A grand staircase led up to the second floor with a glass balustrade and gold trimmings. Behind it was the kitchen and dining area, all glistening and elegant.

I sunk into a couch, my lips parted as I took everything in. Martha and her children watched me, making me feel a little uncomfortable. She looked warm and nice. Maybe I could find a home here. This had great potential. For some of the homes I had stayed at, I usually didn't get such a curious and kind welcome. If anything, Martha looked anxious.

"You remind me so much of your mother. Did you know that I knew your family?" Martha asked, surprising me.

"Um, no. I didn't know," I said, surprised.

"Well, you have so much to learn."