The Minutes We Have

chapter three

I sat at my window, ink gliding over paper. 

I had been writing again. I had stopped in the past when things had gotten bad, when Roman was streetfighting and Ezra wasn't home often. I hadn't felt like I wielded the power to journal about things that bothered me, and sometimes the pen felt heavier than a sword. 

Now, it felt feather-light as I let my thoughts transfer onto the page. I never really thought about what I wrote nor did I know--I just let the words flow and then I would read the aftermath of my absent mind later. Sometimes, I admired it. Other times, I hated it.

I had homework that needed to be done, and I was procrastinating by writing. It was my mortal flaw.

After another moment, I sighed and gently closed my journal. Clicking my pen, I set it down. My eyes rose to the winter landscape beyond my window. It looked pristine, immortalized in silence by the snow that gently cascaded through the leafless trees.

I needed to clear my head for a bit before I delved back into the complexity of humans and science. I decided some fresh air would do some good, and I rose from my chair. Finley, who had been resting at my feet beneath my desk, perked up. 

"C'mon, boy," I smiled, "Wanna go for a walk?" 

Finley got up and came trotting after me. 

I headed downstairs. I knew Mikeal was still working in his office. Ezra was at college for the week and the twins wouldn't be home for another hour or so. It had grown to be late afternoon before I even realized it, and I had assignments due at midnight. 

By the front door, I retrieved a hat and scarf with my heavy winter jacket. If there was one thing I had learned the past few months of living in this new place, it was that the winter breeze could bite. Especially by the late afternoon, and even more so once the sun fell. 

"I'm going for a walk!" I hollered, clipping the retractable leash on Finley's collar. 

"Okay, be safe," Mikeal yelled from his office, "And don't be out after dark, okay?" 

I smiled a little, tempted to roll my eyes but I knew he would sense it. "Okie dokie, Ikea." Sometimes, if he wasn't busy, he would join me.

Today, he seemed to be carried away with work because he hadn't come out of his office for a bit. I didn't mind, I knew that after the clock struck a certain hour, all of his time and attention was ours. He wouldn't prioritize work over family, never again. 

In his own words, family came first. 

I set out with snowflakes saying hello as they melted against my cheeks. It was a little nippy and I was glad I had grabbed my gloves. At the end of the driveway, I turned left instead of going right like I usually did. I had taken Finley on an abundance of walks since we had moved here, and that's how I learned where everything was. 

Finley trotted along beside me, happier than ever with his tongue bouncing out of the side of his mouth. He'd glance up at me, grin in his silly joy, and keep trotting. I had to laugh a few times and ruffle the snow from his golden fur. He was adorable. 

We walked for a bit, and the road had a slight incline, which was working my calf muscles. I stopped for a short break and Finley tried catching a few snowflakes. I bent down and scooped a handful of snow, throwing it in the air above him, and he leaped to try and catch it. 

Suddenly, I realized I had stopped not far away from someone's driveway. There were giant old pines looming over the unplowed road, and only an old set of tire tracks let me know there was even a road there.