chapter twenty-three

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I couldn't corner Ezra. 

He must know I wanted to talk to him about what happened and he stuck close to his friends. Ever since Emerson, Lance, and Ezra had returned from the store with multiple plastic bags filled with snacks---they were acting as if nothing happened earlier tonight. 

I didn't understand. 

Although deep down, I knew that Ezra's defense mechanism was avoidance. He had done it for three years when our parents were gone. He did it whenever I had tried to approach him until I finally stopped trying. He was doing it now. The only explanation I could gather was that the three of them had spoken about it in the car and had come to a conclusion that they seemed intent on not letting me know. 

Guys could be infuriating. 

Ezra tried to slip past me and I snagged his elbow. His eyes met mine and he knew. His voice was quiet as he said, "Later, okay?" 

It wasn't a brush-off. His eyes flickered to our younger brothers who stood at the microwave, popping popcorn. At least he and I could agree that we didn't want to involve the twins in any danger. Some part of me resented that it was our way of trying to protect them because secrets never ended well. Especially dangerous secrets. 

Secrets were bound to happen.

Even when we tried our hardest not to keep them. 

Emerson and Lance were gathering armloads of candy to haul into the living room. I found myself mentally rolling my eyes. Apparently, boys will be boys didn't have an age limit. I gathered a few of my own snacks, stole a popcorn bowl from beneath Julian's elbow, and joined the other guys in the living room. 

We knew that Emerson and Lance were spending the night. There were blankets and pillows and cushions I didn't even know we had strewn across the floor. It looked like a pillow fort that had been obliterated and the guys settled down in the mess like it was nothing out of the sort. 

I jumped onto the couch, over the arm, and settled down comfortably with my blanket. Finley didn't jump up to join me, instead, I found the golden dog making himself comfortable with Lance. Ezra, Emerson, and Lance were propped up against the coffee table. Their drinks behind them, and popcorn bowls on their laps. Finley was eyeing the popcorn whenever someone wasn't looking. 

The twins joined us, flicking off the lights as they came in. Roman took the other side of the couch I occupied and I groaned. I definitely had plans to stretch out later but now I wouldn't be able to unless I shoved my feet on his lap, which I'm sure he wouldn't appreciate. I could just see him shoving me off the couch. 

Julian moved into the armchair. He snatched a blanket from Ezra and dragged it with him. Finley left Lance, wagging his tail as he joined Julian. I simply couldn't believe that Finley was such a traitor. Once upon a time, he had been my guardian angel and only slept in my room. Now, Finley would join anyone for the night but he favored the youngest of us. 

Perhaps we needed another family dog. 

Without realizing it, I glanced at Lance. I could tell he was grinning from the television illuminating the room. He laughed at something one of the guys said and then his eyes briefly met mine. I turned my attention elsewhere, popped a piece of popcorn in my mouth, and then felt someone glaring holes in the side of my head. 

Roman must have seen the tiny interaction. He was frowning and his eyes narrowed on me. I rolled my own in response. We silently communicated our disagreement. Why was he watching me so closely anyway?

Was I playing detective or was he?

The six of us settled down. Only the munch of popcorn, crack of a joke, and grunt from someone getting jabbed could be heard. I didn't miss Julian dropping pieces of popcorn for Finley. It was almost like when we had first adopted Finley and Julian wouldn't stop feeding him underneath the table. Finley was handsomely good at begging now. 

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