This isn't weird.

Already Over It

 "Wow, someone's home late—Good god, Millie, why do you look like someone just ran over your dog?" Tess was curled up on the couch in her pajamas, but she grabbed the remote control and paused the TV as soon as she saw Millie walk through the door with slumped shoulders and despondent eyes.

"What? Oh, I'm fine. Just tired is all," Millie mumbled, attempting to walk past her without stopping.

"You don't look fine. Get your ass over here and give me a hug." Tess stretched out her arms and fixed Millie with an expectant stare until she finally relented and joined her on the couch. She wrapped an arm around Millie's shoulders and pulled her in close. "What's the matter? Did your hike get rained out? It stormed like crazy here."

"Yeah," Millie replied. "But it was okay. We just smoked a joint and hung out in my car all day. It was... really awesome, actually. We had an amazing time." A small smile found its way onto her face, but it faded quickly.

"Well, damn, then why are you looking so sad?"

"I'm fine, Tess. Everything's great. I just..."

"Talk, girl! Spit. It. Out."

Millie's hands interlocked together, her thumbs fidgeting against one another, and she averted her gaze down toward the carpet. "I just thought... I don't know. There were a couple times when I kind of thought he was, like... maybe going to kiss me, or something like that?"

"What now?" Tess looked over at Millie with her best imitation of surprise. "I thought you said Ben was gay?"

"Turns out I was wrong," Millie replied . "It came up at the dinner party. I was so shocked, I almost choked to death at the table. Dustin had to give me the heimlich, and then Genevieve got mad at me for leaving to go to the doctor, so we haven't been speaking, then Ben wanted to go on the hike with me instead, and I... I sort of thought he meant for it to be, like... a date."

"I can't believe you didn't tell me any of that!" Tess exclaimed, almost indignant. "Wow, I... never would have guessed he was into women." She hoped that she sounded convincing.

"We were having so much fun, and he was saying all these really sweet things—like how the person I'm with should treat me like I'm the most important person in the room, and... I don't know. For a moment, I really thought he was saying that he wanted to..." Millie felt her voice beginning to crack, and she took a deep breath to steady it. "It doesn't matter. Nothing happened. I offered to stay the night, and he said no so fucking fast. God, I must have made him feel so uncomfortable."

Tess barely managed to hide her incredulity. It was obvious to her that if Ben had turned down an offer like that, he clearly hadn't understood exactly what Millie had been suggesting, the fucking idiot. Seeing Millie so dejected gave her a twinge of guilt. She could easily have ended all of this confusion months ago.

"Millie," she said hesitantly. "I think Ben—"

"I know, Tess. You don't have to say it," Millie interrupted. "It was ridiculous to think he would ever... I was just high and stupid. Fuck, I really humiliated myself. I hope I didn't make everything weird."

"Millie—"

"At least I can finally stop wondering now. Honestly, this is a good thing. I can finally put it behind me once and for all."

"Maybe you should—"

"It's fine, Tess. I'm already over it. I just need a shower and some sleep and I'll be good as new." Millie yawned and stood up. "Thanks for listening, Tess."

"...Sure," Tess mumbled, and turned the TV back on to drown out her nagging conscience.

As Millie stood in the shower, she couldn't stop her mind from ruminating over the events of the day. It had been such a good day—one of the best days of her life. She wanted to cherish it. She did cherish it. But every memory that made her smile made her want to curl up and cry in equal measure, and she hated herself for it.